Yeah... well you know.

Im...

Sometimes I feel like I'm fighting a loosing battle. As if no matter what I do I can't change the fate that has been sets.
With all the stress of school and all the problems and people that come with it, all the built up anger. No one can look at me and think 'hey, there's someone who's livening their life how they want to live it.' No. If it was that simple: if that was what was really happening then you wouldn't be reading this. I wouldn't be writing this. I would be making plans or maybe catching up on well needed sleep.
Instead they all think 'their not like us, they can't fit In to the category that has been set.' Well maybe not those exact words. But if I were to sum everything that had been said to me or that I've heard been said to others, that sentence would only describe a small fraction of what they really meant by their words.

I would go on to say the rest of what I can only imagine to be what they are truly thinking while they go on about there lives while looking down on us, but I don't think I could handle the truth of what others think. It's not that I'm weak: or maybe it is. It's just that I don't need to think about what they want me to fit in to and I don't want to push my self to fit in to the mould that they think, that they believe to be the only way society excepts a being.

Or maybe I do need to think out what they say. Well then let's think about it.

"Crazy"
"Inhuman"
"Not normal"
"Weirdo"
"Creep"
"Strange"
Sure these come up to everyone... I think. I know others have heard it too.
But then there are ones that hit you deep.
"Fagot"
"Emo"
"Unneeded"
"Unwanted"
"A waste"
There's more. Oh god you wouldn't believe how many more there were but believe me when I say it hurts.
The fact that being judged can harm someone in the same way as physically being beaten up can, sometimes less: sometimes more, is crazy to me. It's not crazy the fact that they harm others. Of course not it's obvious when people say something to someone that it caused them 'pain' if you know what I mean. But whats crazy it the fact that No one gives a shit about it! Because no matter how many people cry, or leave, or go home crying they carry on, they don't stop.

No matter how many people become depressed or emotionally unstable they don't stop.

No matter how many people cut! NO MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE DIE THEY STILL DONT THINK ITS HAPPENED ENOUGH!

No. They don't think that it's been enough until, it's too late for them to stop and help the person they have broken.

You read it every where , if you look hard enough, you hear it everywhere of you listen close enough. You see it everywhere of you pay enough attention.

I know hate world never end. If only the world worked that way. But it doesn't. And everyone needs to live with that fact. That this will never change, that certain people can and will never change.

But I know that I will never let these people win because they don't deserve to see me fall.

That would mean they they have won.

But guess what bitch..

                I'm a sore loser.

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My story is yet to end. The one on here and the one off the screen.