ARCADIA: the undercover blogger

Chapter 1

"Exams will take place in two weeks. Please pick up an assessment notification on your way out the door, and don't forget to enjoy your study filled weekends!" Professor Thorann exclaimed, his face beaming with genuine excitement. He was one of those shiny new and incredibly naive teachers, who everyone knew that within just a few short months, would become sour and hard like the rest of them. His ridiculous cardinal red hair tangled itself around the frames of his glasses, threatening to make it's way into his eyes which were an infinite deep blue. The pathetic, yet somehow contagious and cheesy grin on his face made me hope that for his sake, this school wouldn't break his spirit like it had so many others. 

It made me quite sad to think about the passing of our previous english teacher, Mr Appleby. At the ripe, old age of 58, he'd decided that four bottles of red wine meant more to him than his own life. Rumour has it that he drank himself to death. Yet despite this, I still considered him to be one of the best teachers I'd ever had. 

Barreling out the door of my english classroom and through the oceanic crowd, my bright red, fur lined jacked attracted a somewhat significant amount of attention. I noticed a variety of responses - some of shock, admiration, anger, desire.... And yet for some strange reason, the attention never seemed to fulfil the hollow feeling that resided deep within me. 

With a heart felt sigh, I continued to make my way through the corridor. Excitement grew within me as I pushed open the front doors and crossed the road, into the car park. Each and every day, I felt this exact same excitement over the final end of a long, hard school day. This excitement would then, almost always and without failure, deteriorate as soon as I realised that I would now have to make my way home. The dreaded home. 

Home is where the heart is right? - Well I guess that isn't always so. My heart belongs anywhere but there. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for what I have. But one thing was always certain, my Mother just didn't love me the way I wanted her to, the way I needed her to. 

Instead, I sourced my love from another place - the internet. My blog had over 230,000 subscribers, all after one thing - my style. It felt great to know that people admired me, and wanted to wear the things I wore, and all the while I kept my identity a secret. Nobody, and I mean absolutely nobody knew that I, Arcadia Evans, was the face behind 'whatIwore'. 

Sadie Mitchell, my best friend, was completely in the dark. I felt horrible for keeping such a massive secret from her. I wanted so badly to tell her each and every day, and yet I failed each time. At the end of the day, her friendship meant more to me than anything. I had so much to loose, and that scared the hell out of me. 

The house was SO quiet after school, but this was the usual and so I was used to it. Each day was the same. My brother would be upstairs in his room - most likely in bed with his girlfriend Mavis. He only really came out to make her sandwiches and get her drinks. For some reason, i got the feeling that I somehow made her feel uncomfortable within our home. I didn't really mind though, she's a bit of a whore. 

Mum always worked late hours at the office. This was her coping mechanism to being alone. The saddest part was that whilst she was burying herself in her work, I was just as alone, if not more. He was her husband. She can easily find another husband. But he was my Father, and I can never find another Father. She had known him for part of her life, yet I had known for absolutely all of mine. And now, he was gone. 

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