Fairy Tail Oneshots

The Office: Stayin' Alive {NaLu}

This was inspired by the one and only most iconic scene of tv history, the First Aid Fail in The Office. Just stay tuned for the little twist at the end ;)

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"So, assessing the situation, are they breathing?" The short-haired whitenette asked, pursing our her lips.

Some workers from the Fairy Tail Office were having a meeting, or more so like a small session on how to save a person's life. Lisanna was in charge of today's presentation, so she'd brought a dummy in to practice.

The attractive young man in his early twenties shook his head and propped up on a knee. "No, Lisanna, they are not breathing. And they have no arms or legs." He said, running a hand through his pink locks.

"No, that's not part of it-"

"Where are they?! Y'know what, if we come across somebody with no arms or legs..."Natsu started, a questioning look on his face. "...do we bother resuscitating them?"

The question passed over everyone's heads with no thought or emotion to respond.

"I mean, what kind of quality of life do we have there?" Natsu asked, glancing around.

"I would wanna live with no legs." Droy popped in, a stupid smile on his face while eating a few MnM's.

"How about no arms?"

Droy wrinkles his nose, but Natsu responded.

"No arms or legs is basically how you exist right now, Droy. You don't do anything." Natsu shook his head, a small snort coming from someone in the back that somehow thought his snarky comment was hilarious.

Droy blinked twice and slouched in his seat.

"Alright, so let's get back to it, since you're losing him." Lisanna sighed.

Gajeel just gave a boring blank stare, clearly disappointed at how most of his co-workers were that stupid.

Natsu repeatedly pushed both hands down on the left side rod the dummy's chest at a past pace, still feeling as dumb as the life-sized doll he was 'supposed to be saving.'

'This is so fucking stupid, all I learned is the mouth-to-mouth way, and I NEVER plan on doing that...' Natsu's thoughts groaned, rolling his eyes to look at all of his co-workers' robot stares.

Except one, her gaze was focused on her slim fingers sketching down notes on the pad sitting on her exposed silky long legs, her mini black skirt barely on her thighs, hugging her hips. His eyes couldn't help skimming her hourglass figure again, her golden waist-length blonde hair in a high ponytail, her plump lips curving into a smile-

Wait, a smile?

Natsu's face reddened to see Lucy's cocoa brown eyes meeting his, lightly giggling at probably how stupid he looked.

Another thought crossed his mind, and it was more distracting than being caught red-handed.

'Guess she's an exception.'

Lucy was one of the newer workers here, and by God did she sweep almost every man off their feet when she first walked in six months ago. She was intelligent, more so in fact beautiful inside and out, humble and sweet with the occasional sass, the perfect figure that any woman would kill for.