Smile More

Chapter 1:

10 years ago...

     

        "You're nothing but a freak Tanner! You aren't gonna amount to anything, you're a nobody!" My mother screamed. Another drunken beating by the only person I thought I could look up to.

"No, No mommy I'm sorry! No don't hit me mommy, it hurts! I'll be a good boy, I promise! Please stop hitting me mommy! why are you hitting me?! what did I do mommy?! I won't do it again!"

"Quiet you little brat!" my mother yelled again, this time taking a swig of her alcohol, inducing the intensity of the beating even more.

                              *          *         *

           I saw it everyday. Everywhere I went, people were walking around with smiles on their faces...their stupid little faces. I don’t know how they did it. How did smiling come so easy to these people? I finally figured it out, the smiles were fake. No one was really smiling, it was like they were wearing a mask, a horrible, ugly, despicable mask. You know how I knew? I found out from a...a friend of mine. No one really has ever met him but me. It’s understandable that only I know of my… “friend.” I only see him when I’m alone. His name’s Jack, but he tells me to call him Smilez. He doesn’t look like a normal person. He looks like a Punk Rock kind of kid, but his looks aren’t ordinary of a normal punk. He has a blood red mohawk, that’s normal, but his eyes are cut out to look like the eyes of a monster, he’s missing part of his ear. His ear looks awful, it’s ripped and bloody, with skin hanging off almost down to his piercings. The worst part of his appearance, is his mouth. His mouth is nightmarish, it looks normal as far as average features go, but he cut the most horrific, nastiest smile into the corners of his mouth, with unevenly sewed on stitches to hold it all at least somewhat together.

         Enough about Jack, I don’t think I’ve properly introduced myself. My name’s Tanner, and I’m 17 years old. I’m a schizophrenic, lonely, freak who doesn’t have any friends but an insane psychopath who lives in my mind. I want to be successful in my fucked up life, but I know that no one thinks I’m socially acceptable because I’m “different”, but who gives a shit about those close-minded, arrogant, selfish, wastes of skin we call… people? I don’t mind at all.

          These people don't care about anyone but themselves. They act as if they are caring and full of love, but they turn on a dime. They go from nice and sweet, to a monster straight from the burning pits of the Sixth Circle of Hell. Arrogant beasts. These "things" are the reason I dream of going on a murderous rampage.

                             *      *      *

     "Come on man, do it. Grab the knife, you either get out some anger on yourself or take that knife and introduce it to a few new faces. Its not like you're going on a rampage." Jack said to me while sitting in my room letting my thoughts run wild. "Jack, I'm not in the mood. leave me alone for now." I replied angrily. Jack raised his voice, "I'm telling you, just go find a guy sitting on the street begging for money to get his next fix of heroine. They're the people you want to get a good session of stress release on."

       I'm silent as he gets even more irritated with me. "God dammit Tanner, for Christ's sake man, you know for a fact I don't wanna just sit on my ass all day waiting for opportunity to come knocking on your bedroom door just as much as you do! Now get off your ass, and DO SOMETHING!"

     I instantly respond with anger in my voice. "Bite me, Jack! I'll do what I want to do, when I'm good and ready. You don't need to be here right now, anyway. Just leave, man!" Jack replies with the same tone in his voice, "I'm in your head Tanner! I can't go away. I'm stuck here with you, and you don't wanna have some fun, slice a few jugulars and chop some heads off. You just wanna sit on your ass all day like you’re watching paint dry! You know the weekend is your only escape from those pieces of shit at that prison they call a place of learning?! Make these two days worth it you lazy bitch!"