Ya'll wanna know why heelys are amazing? Well, you a dumb ass if you don't already know. But, I'll spare you. Lemme teach ya all about heelys and their wonderful purpose in the world. All taught by Heely Hoe #2!
The basics:
WANNA KNOW WHY HEELYS ARE GREAT?! BECAUSE WHILE YA WALKING THROUGH SCHOOL OR WHATEVER, YOU CAN JUST GO SKIRT SKIRT DOWN THE HALLS! IT'S LIT! I mean... you might fall. BUT THAT'S JUST FUCKING FUNNY IF YOU DO! HEELYS ALSO RAISE YOUR GRADES! THE DENSITY OF THE HEELYS PLUS THE AIR TIME WHEN THROWING YOUR GOD DAMN HOMEWORK, TIMES THE RADIUS OF THE SUN CAN RAISE YOUR GRADES.
WAIT. WHAT THE FUCK ARE HEELYS?!
HEELYS ARE THE BEST CREATION THAT HAS EVER BEEN MADE IN THE UNIVERSE. THEY GOT THESE TINY FUCKIN WHEELS ON THE BOTTOM SO YOU CAN SKIRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT YOUR WAY THROUGH LIFE. WOOOOOOOO LOOK AT ME SKIRT.
*Ahem*. Well. That got a bit out of hand. I mean... I trashed the city, sent a kid to the hospital with my skirting. And now I have 3 law suits on my hands. BUT IT'S OKAY! WHO NEEDS MONEY ANYWAYS? THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IN LIFE ARE HEELYS. SO BUY THESE GOD DAMN THINGS TODAY!
YOU ARE READING
WE THE HEELY HOES. (By:Heely hoe #2)
RandomThis is all about why heelys are amazing. And why Heely Hoe #2 is better than #1.
