Ghost Train

Chapter 1

"Am I really going to do this?"

Looking down at the busy street about 200ft  feet below me I contemplated whether I would do it this time. If I could do it. Everytime I was too scared, or I found a reason to stay. Just one step and that's all it takes.

"But what about my family?"

What about them?
I mean mom is gone, but dad and Max are still here. Even still dad is different, he isn't as kind and Max is not as innocent. I've tried to help but I keep getting trapped into myself more and more.

"But, your friends. Think about Kyle and Jackson."

They've been distant lately. We aren't as close right now. Besides I've been the one to always get them in trouble. They will be okay.

"But.." 

NO!!! I'm done trying to talk myself out of this. Today was the last straw. But then again, a lot of days were the last straw. So I turned away from the street below and walked towards the door of the roof.

Touching the brass handle gave me a shiver down my spine. New York is a cold, bitter place. And I'm not just talking about the weather. It may be the Big Apple, the dazzling city of wonders. But look closer and you'll see the true nature of this sugarcoated wonderland. Here it's cold, the people are ice and I'm that one little ray of sun that can melt through that icy exterior to see the depth of them underneath. And that scares people, they don't like people knowing who they really are, it leaves them vulnerable. So they cover my sun with clouds, just to stay cold and sparkling forever.

They will never let me go. I'll be stuck behind a cloud forever. Maybe I will just float away. What if I should just float away. I turned around and walked back to the edge of the roof. Looking down I first see my pink vans with the white edges sticking out in the air. Beyond that there is a cracked sidewalk, and the market across the street. I see people walking, with their jackets and coats bundled with scarves and hats alike. I took off my own jacket and let the brisk cold wind send goosebumps on my skin. My thick brown hair whipped me in the face. I don't like the cold, but I do like the wind. If only it was strong enough to make me fly. But the wind disappoints me, it doesn't save me. Looking up I see the dots of puffy clouds, and beyond that.. sky. I always wanted to be an astronaut. So I could fly away from the world. But gravity pulls me down, and forces me to keep falling.

One step and suddenly the people, the sidewalk, the market. They are all much closer.