VKOOK | NORMAL BOY

NORMAL BOY

"Do you know why...I am a bad person?"

All my memories started erasing,one by one.Every small image flashed before my eyes,as if I was about to die.As if it were my latest moments on Earth and my last breath.Everything was so vivid,as if...I was reliving them.A cold tear dropped from my tired human eye.Tears? I was wondering,when was the last time I had any human reaction like that? My body didn't sweat,didnt get cold or warm.In fact my body was just a vessel,very well made and strong.Durable,almost indelible.In time,in pain and in human emotions.But...
was it really?
He seemed so calm in those pictures.And I am so very sorry to him.I didn't mean to.As the latest of my memories get erased,I look down.My hands,the ones that were created for pain and misery has served their purpose.But why did it feel so empty inside of me?Was I always like this before I meet him?
I can't even remember my pitiful and pathetic life before he walked in.

Do you know his name? It was Kim Taehyung...Kim Taehyung was very,very energetic.I'll replay it for you just once,before I completely erase it from my hard disk.

He was an incredible boy.His voice was husky and sounded warm whenever he called my name.I met him on one of my dark days.You see,I am made like this.My whole body is a destroying machine.I was created not to love,but to destroy.I was not created for emotions,or human interactions,nor I was ever exposed to those.I didn't have remorse or sense of guilt,every time that I would get the order to kill different types of people in different areas,in different towns.I traveled like a normal person among normal people.The people didn't see an artificial killer but a normal boy walking into a bus.And then,secretly and discreetly I would finish my purpose.And sleep soundly the same night.

So,I never knew how it felt like to be called by a name.I was always called as a number,as another one of the experiments.His voice calling me,him passing his arm around my neck and swinging happily while walking next to me,these were moments that printed in my empty of emotion folder.Moments that were the hardest to erase.

"Jungkook ah! Yaaaaa Jeon Jungkook! You rascal,where have you been all day!?" Taehyung pouted at me with a playful expression.He was always playful like that and full of life.I guess i was the poker face of our company..But that's because he amazed me so much.His bright smile shined through the cloudy day.I had just killed another target,before this boy approaches me innocently.I was gone for the whole day. "Let's go,I got something to show ya today!" His eyes formed a crescent as he smiled again to me,this time dragging my arm to pull me to the open road.
He was jumping around like a curious fox that wanted to experience and interact with everything.He walked in a goofy way,in a way that betrayed he didnt know much about the outside world.He was really,so pure.It pained me at some point.Was I even worthy of meeting such a person?

I didn't tell him almost anything about who I really am or my past.I even made up some lies.Since he couldn't know my real identity and I would never like to put him into such danger.I told him I was an orphan and that I never met my parents.That I lived alone since very young age and that I was working someplace quiet,a normal non ambitious job.He seemed to believe me and even sympathized with my story.He reached his hand to touch my shoulder,as in sign that he would be there for me.His hot hand transferred all of its warmth to my shoulder,and made me feel.Something that has never happened before.
I found myself seeking for this warmth more and more often.I would sit closer to him and touch my arm with his quietly.That feeling was so comforting that I wanted to experience it all the time.I was somehow addicted in his lively existence.In the fact that he was alive.

"COME ONNNN!" He screamed at me from the peak of that building.I was coming slowly,trying to pretend I was tired.I wasnt even panting from the long road but I pretended that, too."Ohhhhh you really have no stamina at all eh?" Taehyung teased me jokingly while pulling my arm to drag me to the top once more.His expression softened and he seemed nostalgic and a bit sad."Isn't this place really beautiful?" I nodded.Then his left foot moved forward.His smile has started fainting a bit and his eyes were fixated at the sunset."Beautiful..."he whispered.My eyes widened and i held his arm before he pushes himself in the vacuity. "Taehyung." His head turned to my direction and his eyes met mine.The faint smile was still there but his gaze was very empty."Is it your father again? What are these bruises?" His arm was full of bruises and scratches again.And this was happening over and over."Or is it Joon Hyung and his friends again?" My eyes got darker without I realized.Then he,so unexpectedly ran and hugged me."I am okay Jungkookie!I am okay you see? I can walk and run cant I ? I can hug,so I am okay!"I felt something in my chest.Something crumbled,something shifted.It was like an acid pierce through it..."Jungkook are you okay?Your skin is...steaming." I woke up from my short angry fantasy.I wasn't controlling my body's reactions."Tell me,was it Joon Hyung?Let's go to find him right now."

No matter how hard Taehyung tried to pull me away,I managed to find Joon Hyung's file.I researched and found exactly where he was.Taheyung was puzzled so he didn't notice me using my forces to find where Joon Hyung was hiding.Countless times,I fought for Kim Taehyung.And every damn time I had to pretend.I pretend I was hurting,I activated the sensitive skin feature,where all the scars and bruises showed.I screamed so Taehyung believed me.To him I was still a human and I shouldnt blow my cover.Of course all of my scars healed extremely quickly,so to excuse my quick healing I had to draw them again.I didn't even feel anything.I wanted to protect him so badly.I only feel guilty of not being able to protect him from his own father.That's why he was having those suicidal thoughts,and tendencies.I wish he was happy.

Taehyung wanted to escape his abusive days at school and at his home,so he was always out of the house,searching for places without many people,to relax and calm himself.Kim Taehyung loved sunrises and drawing graffiti,so he dragged me along in all those kinds of places.Everyday images I saved in my disk from his face,I wonder If I will be able to forget even after erasing.His puffed cheek from the lollipop that he sucked,his coconut colored hair that jumped up and down along with this movements.His smile.His goofy dances.Did you know?He had the most unique expressions.My motion detector could never recognize his emotions or thoughts through his face.

I was drawn to him as a bug to the light.It's so bright that it attracts you,that it makes you wanna touch that beautiful light,you know? That makes you want some of this energy.And I was engulfed in his glow.I guess you could tell we were addicted to each other's presence.I was making him feel safer,he was making me feel alive.And little by little,we formed this special relationship.Little by little we developed an inseparable bond.

Even though I kept getting notified for possible targets without he knows,I was living beautifully for once.For once in my life,I was not treated like a machine,like a lifeless piece of chunk.For the first time in my life,I was feeling.I was treated like a human being,like a normal boy.And that's all I wanted to be too.I wanted to live a normal life...with him,if possible now.All I wanted now was to be next to him,because he was the only person that I could feel like myself with.Until that day.

It was raining heavily.I had some chores and shopping to do.Taehyung wanted to come over and eat together so I had to pretend my house was full of supplies like a person who needs to eat to survive.I returned home.I dropped the jacket on the sofa,and laid next to it lazily.I missed him.I felt like missing him.I wanted to see him badly,I wanted his smile to paint colorfully my dull rainy day.When the bell rang I almost jumped off the sofa and ran to the door.

"I am here!!" Taehyung appeared happy as always holding a bag with jajangmyeon."I brought the foooooood~" He said in a funny voice and proceeded to enter my apartment. "I am sorry it's a bit messy..."
"Its alright!" He hurried to reply,and he indeed didnt seem disturbed at all by the messy clothes here and there.And then we sat on the table.We ate and we laughed.And we talked.
*bing bing bing*
My phone beeped,there was a message. "Sorry I got to get this,one second." I told him."Yeah,do your thing,I'll clean up a bit!"
My eyes read the one line message greedily and my previously formed smile after I saw giggly Tae,started freezing on my face.I started feeling a cold air around me.He turned and looked at me,with those deer doe eyes.He turned and looked at me like a deer,without him realizing that he was looking right at his hunter.

"Kill Kim Taehyung." But me,I didnt even have the time.My feet and arms and everything moved on their own.My vision blurred and a white noise started covering my hearing.I could see his eyes widening in front of me,I could see his hands raising defensively and him taking steps back.In my blurried memory I think I heard him asking me what is wrong or if I am okay.But even though my eyes were watery,I couldn't do anything but bring in my vision Taehyung's data and the target symbol appeared in front of me.Everytime I looked at him,he would get targeted."Please,go away,run!" I shouted,before I started running after him.

Of course,his body couldn't keep up.But there was nothing I could do! My body wouldn't listen to any of my commands.It was pre programmed.All of me was programmed to destroy,already.I didn't know why it had to be him.He was the purest,he never threatened anyone.Seeing him running away from me,seeing his face wet from tears broke me.But...I had no choice.
My arms raise,while a bang is heard.Through all of Taehyung's pleading and questions,I could feel a part of my heart breaking.A part that could never be glued again.His blood painted the carpet.And I will never forget all the red I saw that night.Even If I erase my memory.

Do you know,why I am not a good person...?
Because I am not even a person.
*system shutdown*