Hey Austin.
I bet you're wondering why I'm writing you huh?
well its for a few reasons.
I don't know why you hurt me all those years. Why you laughed when you saw I was in pain. What did I ever do too you? I don't know.
Why?
Its a simple question, that I will never get an answer too.
I'll never get to know why you had HIM rape me. Or why you and your other friends would touch me in private area. I'll never know why I had to lose my virginity at 14. I'll ever know why you had such joy in burning my skin with your cigarette butt. Or why you smiled as you beat me. Or why you told me I was worthless And ugly and dumb and that I would never be good enough for anyone.
What you don't know, is I constantly cried myself to sleep at night because of you. You made me terrified to step into my own house without my mom there. How you drove me to cutting, because I felt like I was like paper. That you were in control of me.
Why? did this happen to you as a kid? Maybe so. But why feel the need to put me in pain. I did nothing too you. All I ever wanted was for you to be proud of me. Is that too much to ask? When you married my mom, you were supposed to love us both. And when Shayleigh was born, you were supposed to love her. But did you? No. All you ever told my mom was lies. When you said you loved her, and you loved me. That was a lie. You never loved me, and I doubt you ever will.
Why did you put me through all that pain? I spent so long, hiding bruises. Trying to hurry and cover them before school, so people wouldnt know.
"This is a story that I have never told
I gotta get this off my chest to let it go
I need to take back the light inside you stole
You're a criminal
And you steal like you're a pro
All the pain and the truth
I wear like a battle wound
So ashamed, so confused
I was broken and bruised
Now I'm a warrior
Now I've got thicker skin
I'm a warrior
I'm stronger than I've ever been
And my armor, is made of steel, you can't get in
I'm a warrior
And you can never hurt me again
Out of the ashes, I'm burning like a fire
You can save your apologies, you're nothing but a liar
I've got shame, I've got scars
That I will never show
I'm a survivor
In more ways than you know"~Warrior, by demi lovato.
I am a warrior Austin. You broke me, but I'm getting fixed now. I'm stronger than I have ever been. You can never hurt me again Austin. I wont let you. I kept quiet too long, and now, it was time my story is told.
I want you to know, that I forgive you. Even though all you put me through, I still forgive you. I hope one day, we can talk again, and put all this behind us.
Sincerely,
Your step-son Parker
