Conflict

Thinking of Roses

As he kisses me, I can't stop thinking about Rose. Will I ever see her again? God, I hope so, that's all I can think as his hands trail down my back to my waist, then down to my.. God Rose. As much as my brain wants to continue to pretend that this touch is Rose's, my body knows it is not, these hands are hard and rough. They are not manicured. They do not brush my breasts softly. They do so firmly, and with calloused hands. 

He grabs my wrists and pins them down to my side. I try to get Rose out of my head as quickly as possible, especially now that his mouth is on me. I love him I think to myself. On top of that, I'm not gay, at least I don't think I am. As he looks up at me for praise, mouth still on me, I think back to my summer romance with Rose and instantly, I reach my peak. "God!" I say and quiver. 

Mark licks his lips sensually and comes back up to kiss me, the same way Rose would do after she went down on me. I want to get her out of my head quickly, so I suggest to mark that we go out to the new club. He agrees and I get up to get dressed, not forgetting to grab my fake ID out of my blingy new purse. The purse that my father bought for me after not coming to see me, again. I push my sperm donor out of my head and look at Mark. He's getting dressed and I watch every muscle in his back move as he puts on his shirt. Rose is now out of my mind and I want to jump his bones, I fear that when I do, I'll start thinking about Rose again, so I decide against it and we go. Mark kisses me as we walk out of the door and I taste myself on his lips. "I've actually really missed you babe" I say to him. 

"Why wouldn't you" he replies 

"No, I don't mean it like that, I just mean.. you know, you were gone for so long I just thought maybe things would be different when you got back" 

"Do you feel any different about us or something?" He looks at me and strokes his hair before pulling off. 

"No!" I say. I lie. 

Mark went away for the summer to go intern at his dad's company, We'd been dating for a year, but decided that we would not put restrictions on each other while we were apart. It would be so easy for me to tell Mark about Rose, this was our agreement. except, Mark did not see anyone over the summer. I feel like I've betrayed him. I make up my mind that I won't tell him about Rose. 

***********************************************************************************************Hello! I've decided to make a new book even though I'm still working on my others. I have a few chapters prewritten for this book. I'll be putting them out soon! I hope everyone enjoys. Thanks for reading!!!

Warning: This book will contain graphic language and descriptions of sex and violence.