Too Hurt To Love

Chapter 1: "Maybe life isn't for everyone."

A/ N: Okay well I don't really know where I'm gonna go with this story, but I'm really excited for it. I do not believe councilor's are bad or are like this, but the one's I have in the story are made up. I'm sorry for how sad this is going to be, but trust me there will be a whole hell of a lot of happiness and romance to make up for it! Also this first chapter is gonna start off confusing but if you keep reading you'll understand what's going on. Happy reading babes. : l
Shoot one more thing, I changed a lot, including characters, please re-read and tell me weather I should continue or not! Ily I'm done sorry.

-Hayley xoxo

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Chapter 1: "Maybe life isn't for everyone."

Red Blue Red Blue . . . Black

I woke up in a hospital bed... I looked up to find my best friend, my older brother, and my dad staring at me their eyes filled with sympathy and relief.
"How do you feel?" My best friend Ally said with tears rolling down her face.
"I feel wonderful," when I spoke it came out weak and raspy, instead of strong and sarcastic like I was hoping. When I moved my head I saw my arms covered in white bandages.

"This is no time for sarcasm Veronica Marie," my dad said with a thick voice, like he had been crying too. A wave of regret flowed over me.

"Your right, I'm sorry."

"Your sorry?" My brother said.

"Yes I'm sorry," I replied to my brother, who is 2 years older than me, but is not so mature for his age.

"We almost lost you, V" his voice cracked. It was true though, I tried to take my own life. I didn't know what to say, I'm not sorry for it. I'm sorry for hurting them, but I'll never be sorry for wishing for something other than to be hurting.

"That's enough Liam, she just woke up we'll talk about this later," My father said. They all made they're way towards me and engulfed me in a long hug. I could feel my best friend shaking and I wished I could assure her I was okay...but I'm not.

***

"I don't care! I do not care anymore, it doesn't matter, no one ever stays... Why should I sit here and be in pain when all anyone ever does is leave when it gets rough, or they can't handle it? Hell, they leave weather or not it's hard, no one cares about my feelings. It's like no matter how hard I try I will never be enough and honestly I have come to accept it. No one cares so neither do I,"

"And what gives you the impression that no one cares?" The stupid judging lady asks.

"It'd be easier to count what doesn't give me the impression, there's a lot less to count."

"Again though I want to get to the root of the problem," she insisted.

"What root? There's not just one problem, it's just a million different things that add up and it never stops hurting. There's never a break where things are just okay. They say life isn't fair, but it wasn't my choice to be here and that's the most unfair thing about it all."

"Deep breath, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Its okay to cry. Let it all out, sometimes it's better to clear your system before you accept help," she advised me. I reached up to check my cheeks and of course the back stabbing tears betrayed me once again.

I angrily wiped them away, "I don't need to cry," or at least that's what I tell myself. Cause the woman in front of me doesn't need to see me weak.

As if reading my mind she says, "Crying isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. It means you've been to strong for so long that it's become unbearable and it's time to open up and let go," She sounded like my dad 'It's a sign of strength' I thought back remembering that day. "Tell me please you say everyone left, but you still have your friends and your family. Is there more to your pain?"