Story of My Life: Treech Higwit

My Life in 564 words

Hi, my name is Treech Higwit. I was born in Antarctica. I am now also the princess of Riceland, and I'd like to tell you all how the heck it happened.

So, my parents met in the Tri-state area. They were Perry the Platypus' long lost uncle's mother's dog Walker's grandmother's cousin, twice removed, they said. They told me they were "soulmates". Yada, yada, yada, they got married and had me.

My mom told me I suddenly screamed this one word at the doctor when I came out. It was "tikitongkitang". Everyone in the operating room went silent when I screamed that.

They then moved to Antarctica, apparently because they got bored. We literally don't have any neighbors because we lived so far from everyone else, so I tried to make friends with the penguins and polar bears. I'm such a loner. For some reason, they just hate me. Oh well, they'll always be my little frosty babies. What? I call them that, okay? Wait, this is probably why they hate me.

When I started preschool, my teachers always laughed at me for always thinking about food. For example, the teacher would show a picture of a jellyfish and ask us what it was and I'd say "teacher, it's jelly-ace" or when the teacher would show a picture of a cheetah, I'd say Cheetos.

Anyways, as I entered grade school, we had this really cool subject, unicorn riding. It was cool because we were taught how to ride unicorns! Yes. Real, unicorns. Our teacher, Mr. Periwinkle, was really strict. Ironic, right? Someone who has a name as Periwinkle doesn't exactly sound like a strict person. Nobody could take him seriously though.

Everytime he'd demonstrate on a unicorn, it just looked really funny seeing a really serious teacher ride a unicorn. "Okay class, I will demonstrate how to do the "Sparkle Dive" on Shimmer. Watch and learn." He says, in a mono-tone voice.

Highschool. It was horrible. We had to study about moles and warts in Health class.

Moving on to when I finally graduated and entered college. I left Antarctica and went to Riceland. It was basically Iceland with an R.

I joined various courses like Coconutolgy, Cornology etc. None of them I liked, though. So I decided to skip college and move on with my life.

One day, I was walking along the streets of Riceland. I saw this guy, he was talking on the phone. He kept saying "yeah" and "ok". When he hung up on the phone, I said hi, cause why not.

He said hi back. We wanted to know more about each other so we talked in the cafe. Apparently, he is the Prince of Riceland. I immediately kneeled down on the floor and praised him as he said that. Me? Getting to know the Prince of Riceland, in a cafe?! What a world

We became the best of friends. One day, he told me he really liked me. I really liked him too.

Years later, he asked me to marry him?? He kneeled down on the floor and brought out a sack of rice with a ring in it. Awesome.

Right, I was getting married to the prince of Riceland. This is crazy. Before I knew it, I was now the princess of Riceland.

And that's my bizarre life. And more bizarre things to come.