déjà vu¡!

prologue ii

if you ask me when all this started, i would give you a very brief introduction on my ... love life? well, i first met him in grade 5. wait no, scratch that, i knew him since first grade. i only started talking to him in fifth and realizing i had a crush on him.

it all starts out as a crush. that's what they say.

i was a thin, dark haired, introverted girl with absolutely no sense of style. i had 4 close friends that year. my teacher sucked. he sucked all the damn way. i hated him, and that's all i can say about that.

i first started talking to him because we were put in the same table group, along with one of my present close friend and older guy friend. we talked a little at first, most of what was small talk. it progressed until we became relatively good friends. we shared inside jokes, he was comfortable to be around, and he didn't judge me on my appearance, but on the inside. (i still don't get how people like me? i'm such a boring, annoying person.)

by the end of the year we were closer than ever and i started to develop some feelings for him. it was a tiny teeny crush. and he knew about it thanks to some of my "friends". it wasn't that big of a deal and i was fine with it. he remained friendly to me.

that's the short version, by the way.

grade 6
we drifted apart during the summer of 5th and 6th grade. when we returned to school, we weren't as friendly as before, but still nice to each other. we acknowledged each other's presence and shared the same jokes as before. during the middle of the year. my teacher paired us up to write a story together based on a toy we found.

we worked together and created a (sort of) funny and cute story about an animal. we laughed through it and you could even say we were a perfect team.

my feelings for him drowned out over the summer. but it all started again when my friends started "shipping" me with him in 6th.

ells and him, they would all say, sitting in a tree...

i guess i started having feelings for him again, but it was all bullshit. i knew he'd never like me back. how could he? he likes another girl as far as my little grade 6 mind knew. i had no chance with him, and even if i did, i wouldn't date him. i was only 11, and in no shape to be in a relationship.

we ended off 6th grade pretty nicely and smoothly. we didn't talk at all over the summer, i never saw him again until the start of the year of 7th grade.

... that's where i am now. my name is Ells, i am 12 years old, and currently in 7th grade.