W A S T E D

I love you

I love you. I love you was so sacred before. You don't just give them to anyone. You only give them to someone who you think deserves to be part of your life and whom you want to give your heart. But suddenly as the time flies by so quickly, We say I Love You to particularly anyone. Somehow it used to be sacred in the way that WE say it personally . It used to be meaningful but I guess not anymore. Simple lang naman people now kasi say I Love You in chat, In text or anywhere. That's the problem kasi eh we tend to fall for traps . We tend to be fooled. We tend to love even though you know that you're only hurting yourself. I really don't get any of it. Its not that its wrong but also its not that its right. Doesn't mean that someone tells you I love you is really true some are just saying it to make you feel better about yourself. Some just say it because they want you to make a fool out of yourself. Ewan ko nga bakit ako din nagpakatanga sa isang taong g*go pala. Lesson learned pero bakit ang tanga tanga ko pa din na piliin siya. I know infatuation lang tong nararamdaman ko pero bakit masakit parin? Obvious naman kasi na mas maganda pa ang pinili niya kaysa sa akin. Mas matalino. Halos lahat nasa kanya na. You know every f*cking night I tell myself "Am I not enough? Am I not worth the fight?" Every f*cking night. So many unanswered questions and so many What ifs. Its so hard being stuck between expectations and reality. Its so hard to sleep at night thinking and convincing myself that everything is fine and eventually it will be. Convincing myself to forget about him. Ewan ko kahit anong tanggal ko sa isip ko hindi siya mawawala dito sa dibdib ko. Kahit anong paraan nang paglimot ko hindi parin mawala. There is still a part of him in there and will always be part of me.