I've Seen Hell... (The Chronicles Of Angels - Book 2 - fragment)

“In love! You hear that? Love! I, Gabriel, ended up by loving even the stupid things you make me do!”

“Shut up, Gabriel! Stop! I don’t want you to say something that you might regret later…”

“Regrets? Ha! What do you know about regrets? I have to watch myself every day helplessly falling for you and your stupid way of seeing things, and life, and… Father help me, Aeris, for you are my punishment and my joy…”

“Excuse me?! Oh, you are something, Gabriel! How dare you calling me your punishment?!”

“Do you like the second part better?”

“I just can’t believe my ears. Haven’t you learned anything yet? To have something, you must give up something, that’s the way things suppose to be… Gabriel… you cannot love”, she whispered slowly trying to catch her breath.

“What makes you say that? I’m here, ain’t I? Standing in front of you with only my soul to offer… You made me see me; you made me find my own spirit, all my hopes and dreams that I thought long gone, arouse today and all this thanks to you… So, why can’t I love? Something? Someone? You?”

“You really can’t understand, can you? Look, I’ll make it easier for you. But try not to get angry, for I will never speak to you again. Tell me, what is it deep inside yourself that guides you through all this?”

“My love for our Father, of course. That’s an easy question; I thought you could do better than that… what?”

“I am better than that. The problem is that you, Gabriel, are not.”

“Why?!”

“Be patient, please. It’s good for me to know what you’re thinking and I’m glad we’ve finally started this conversation, but I think it’s enough for one day. Besides, it’s almost time for you to go on patrol, so I guess I’ll see you tomorrow…”

“Tell me, Aeris!” His teeth were clenched, his eyes rolling thunders. She sighed easily.

“Fine. Are you sure you really want to know?”

“Yes!”

“Good! It’s not love, but pride the burning fire inside your soul, that’s why I can’t believe a word you’re saying and, in fact, I’m absolutely sure you are mistaken.”

“Pride? How come? Explain yourself.”

“It’s late, Gabriel, please…”

“No, I don’t care. I want to know your thoughts. What am I proud of, Aeris?”

“First of all? Of yourself. Father may have loved you enough to give you the most important mission and the best talent of us all, but look at you, Gabriel. Is this the way you are thanking him? And worst of all, you admitted it yourself, remember? That night when I asked you if you ever knew love, you told me that you are proud to be maybe the only angel that never loved in his whole life, mortal or immortal…”

“I was wrong…” He said in a harsh tone. She gave him a sad look.

“No, I don’t think so, Gabriel. I believe you were right.”

“I’m sorry to hear that… but I am also glad that you are finally able to speak to me so directly. What other reasons made you believe that I’m guided only by my pride?”

She watched the snowflakes falling silently onto the soft grass for a moment.

Gabriel seemed to enjoy it too, although his gaze was darkened by the same fire that kept burning the entire day.

“Your detachment”, she dared to continue. “Right now, as you stand in front of me waiting for my words and watching the snow falling, you’re giving me the best example of detachment. It seems like you’re not even here, lost in your own world where nothing can touch you, where you are above the rest… Maybe I didn’t manage to express myself too clearly and I am sorry, but that’s the way I see you...”

“All the time?”

“Since we’re here”, she admitted.

“You know… surprisingly as it seems, I must thank you.” He said in a low, sad voice.

“What for? I did nothing else but criticize you the whole time.” She blinked in shock, realizing for the first time what her words must have meant to him.

“That’s true, but thanks to you, tonight I’ve seen hell…” his lips shivered in the late rays of light “…and it’s white…” he whispered softly before loosing himself in the shadows, “…snow white.”