April 16th, 2017None of us saw Wesley after he was taken into custody yesterday. I didn't really want to, I couldn't see him. I couldn't look into the eyes of someone who murdered my best friend.
I felt guilty. Guilty about Liv, guilty about Wes. Everything made me feel guilty now. I felt guilty that Liv was dead. I felt guilty I couldn't face Wes.
I couldn't. Who does that to a person? Who was so twisted that they could kill someone they'd grown up with? It was like the stories parents used as a warning- "be careful with that boy he's trouble" "Did you see on the news that girl who got killed just because she said no?" "be careful of" "be careful" "be careful" "be careful"
It was always "be careful".
Is anyone really careful here? If they were they would've figured it out by now and this would all be over.
I never really paid attention to the horror stories. I mean, I had Jack playing the big brother role ready to punch out whoever tried to hurt me, I had Pat who was always willing to hurt someone if they pissed me or Liv off, and Wes.
Except, Wes was who I needed protecting from now. At least that's what everyone said. Wes pleaded "Not Guilty" in his arraignment. Not Guilty, like he wasn't found right there sitting above Liv covered in blood.
Not Guilty.
Not Guilty was such an ironic way to put things. Not guilty was what everyone pleads when they've done wrong but think the law doesn't apply to them. That's how everyone pictured Wes from the news reports- the rich privileged white boy who gets away with everything.
Gets away with murder.
Who even knows if Wes actually did it? We weren't there right when it happened. We were only there before and after the fact. The only two people who actually know are Liv and Wes- and Liv was dead.
I kept thinking about how Wes felt- was he scared? He had to have been shaking standing in front of the police and the judge. Testifying and saying he hadn't done it. He wasn't guilty. Was he standing in front of them shackled with handcuffs police standing close in case he attacks? Was he standing without fear looking murderous? Cocky? Sad? Confident?
I flicked through all the different versions of Wesley I've seen. Confident Wesley, shoulders squared back, legs shoulder width apart looking every inch the privileged boy he was standing up in front of the judge. Upset Wesley, hunched shoulders, brows furrowed. There were so many versions of him that could have been in front of the judge.
Part of me wishes I was there in the courtroom with Wes, holding his hand, whispering that it would be alright, even when I didn't know if it would be all right. I wanted to be with Wes, be at his side cuddled into him like we always were- Wes, an arm wrapped around my shoulders, head on top of mine with me wrapped around his side.
A bigger part of me wanted to throttle Wes, wanted to scream at him, wanted to hurt him. He took away Liv, my best friend, he took away the girl who made me something.
**
I hadn't come out of my room in days, curtains shut, lights off hiding under the covers away from the world and what was happening. I couldn't pick up my phone and see the media going crazy throwing up article upon article about Wes and Liv. His mugshot the first thing you'd see when you opened up your phone or turned on your television.
We were the perfect story- the beautiful blonde golden girl brutally murdered by the gorgeous, privileged golden boy. We were perfect, the eyes of the world were on us, capturing our every move. Everyone wanted to know why. Why did this group of seemingly perfect friends have something so tragic happen? We were the perfect story. Everyone thought they figured it out, they assumed from our stereotypes they knew us like they were there. People thought they knew us personally after all the specials, articles and news reports on us. We fascinated them, the puzzle they were desperate to solve. Perhaps we would have been just another murder if we weren't attractive, we were just the faces the media needed. The faces that looked perfect to the outside world and so everyone was locked in on us from beginning to end.
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Misterio / SuspensoWhen Olivia Parker is found dead at a high school party gone wrong, it seems obvious who her killer was. Wesley Owens was found next to her covered in blood. Obviously, he did it. The question was why. With the entire senior class attending the end...