Zainab's Little Secret

Chapter 14 *Dear diary📒📝📃*

Zainab's POV
I was just thinking about what happened few hours ago like how can he be so pessimistic?,what's wrong with him for Allah's sake? He has never been like this since I have known him,I think something is wrong somewhere. But what could be wrong?,what could be bothering his mind?. I think I have to talk to him and have a heart to heart discussion with him. Few minutes later,I felt some strong cramps around my stomach area and before I could do anything I discovered I was already having my period,how the timing of this thing can be somehow at times😟,at least not now that I have so much to think about but alhamdulillah there are people who has never seen theirs so hmmmm zee don't think like that ok?? Alhamdulillahhhhhh!!! as I breathed out...

Ok now that I can't pray and besides I promised to reply Muhammad, I think it's high time I sent him the message..I don't even have an idea of what to type as in how to express myself..it's just crazy😰😰ok zee!! Breathe in humphhhh breathe out arghhhhh!!, in and out,in and out... I think I am feeling so much better now ok so let me start💭

Salamualaikum waramatullah wabarakatuh Muhammad, how are you? Is anything the matter? Is it something you want to share? I don't mind if you want to share with me.. Emm concerning what you told me about the love thing, I want you to know that it's normal and halal for we as humans to love because of our body chemistry but it's haram to engage in a bf-gf relationship because we might be tempted to commit zina, Allah said "la tekirobu zina" "do not go near zina"..But all the same,I will like to tell you before I regret that I feel the same way about you Muhammad, I love you too but I wouldn't mind if we start off as best friends and if Allah wills,you might be my husband who knows.. Remember Allah is the best of all planners and besides I think you will be a great father and husband so we can start off as friends and see where this leads ok? I know I am not decisive and my answer is not straightforward but I want you to know that I am in a state of dilemma.. Salam Muhammed.. Ttyl..

Hmmmph!!! I breathed out as I pressed the send button and I just realised that all these while I have been holding my breath and I didn't even realise on time till I sent the message. God I am so damn nervous like what have I just done? Zee you know this is wrong but my heart is doing the thinking, I think the fact that he is the second guy I would love so deeply with all my heart is the problem..😱😱my God what have you done to me Muhammad?!! I can't even think straight.. 😨😨*****There was a guy zee had a crush on for 2 years and all along she pretended as if nothing happened but she decided to stop loving him after she heard that he was dating her distant friend who was just too proud and so she was hurt, heart broken and even cried 💔but she's over all of that now😂😂,astagfirllah for zee because she was happy when she heard they broke up mainly because of envy and also because it would put an end to the haram relationship****...

But then I decided to clean up my room before I stumbled upon my jss diary,I saw the prayers I wrote there suratul kahf on Fridays as a reminder,suratul kafirun,mulk and all was there..I smiled as I remembered the day I was writing it,then I flipped another page and I saw a coded stuff which I wrote and after which I decoded it to be the list of guys I have had a crush on right from the very first guy God how could I be so stupid??,as in God how can i even remember? I can't even remember having a crush on anyone of them😂😂 All those stupid puppy love that would last like a month or so..mtchewwww as I bursted out into a laughter 😂😂 and then I spotted a place where I wrote about a fight my mom and dad had which wasn't violent but the words they said was too heart breaking💔💔, I became sober till I found another page where I wrote about the Dana airline crash where about 300 lives was lost and how nobody survived the crash and how many innocent people were crushed and burnt beyond recognition.. Innah lillah ilaehi rajihun.. May Almighty Allah grant them AL jannah firdaus.. I could remember that very day it happened,it was a sad day on June 3rd ,the whole country was mourning about their loved ones..As I remembered everything tears began to find their way down my cheeks and I bursted out into tears..I couldn't hold it in anymore I needed to let it all out, the scene of the accident was terrible and saddening,what made it worse was the fact that I remembered that every soul shall taste death even me someday..but may Almighty Allah grant us long life in good health and in wealth..amin I said as I rubbed my face and then looked at at another page where I was praying to God to bless my parents so they would take me to a boarding school where my cousins were😂😂...

I laughed as I saw my tiny handwriting and saw the drawings I made😂 but I was just too tired and exhausted after I have just read my diary...oh my poor little interesting diary!! I think the old me was quite a naughty, stubborn little girl😇..Alhamdulillah I said as I realised I am way mature than before and thank God I am alive to see all of this..Before I could steal some nap,I heard my mom calling me "Zainab!!!!, Zainab!!!! " MA I screamed as I answered her from my room as in so typical of African mothers, I am pretty sure you wouldn't believe what she called me for, she asked me to help her pick the remote in front of her leg as she wants to change the channel to something nicer..And I was like wait!! What?? She called me all the way to pick up the remote she could have just picked herself? Wow she never ceases to amaze me!! As I turned my back about to leave she was like please get me a bowl of fruit salad from the fridge immediately I returned she said again ehn ehn get me a good toothpick and when I got back she said again get me a bottle of water and a cup and then she said again get me my phone at the dining room and deep down I was just breathing heavily so I could let out my frustration and anger because I didn't just want to annoy her and before she could say anything immediately I dropped it I ran to my room as fast as I could and locked my door as I was panting because of the lil race around the house...hmmph!!! Good riddance🙅 oops!!🙊..

I climbed my bed immediately and quickly switched on my fan and laid completely care free on my bed😜 because all I want from mom right now is a quick nap, I was close to having a good deep sleep before I heard my phone ringing and before I could pick it I had missed the call and then I saw Muhammad's message which went thus;

Walaiykum salam waramatullah wabarakatuh zee,thank you so !much for understanding and please I promise I won't let you down and besides please can I see you tomorrow? Like can you come to my house tomorrow? I have somethings to discuss with you if you won't mind.. Walaykum Salam...ttyl..

And then I sleepily replied ok no problem.. In shaa Allah see ya tomorrow.. Good night.. before I drifted off to sleep...

Asalamualaikum waramatullah wabarakatuh dear readers, sorry for the late update,can you make the writer happy simply by voting,commenting, voicing out your opinions and sharing..Jazakhillah khairan as you do so..😘
Yours lovingly,
Dizza99💖💖
Au revoir✌✌...