It was late midnight and everthing was a mess. Her things were scattered all over her dark and empty room for an unknown reason, a perfect description of what she felt at the moment. Messed up, alone and nothing but in darkness. She was there crying on her bed, curled up and hugging herself tightly, the only way to comfort herself. She felt so hurt and didn't know why.
'Why did I need to live? It's all useless. Am I here just to feel the pain? Isn't that a bit unfair for me?' She knows she's a sinner but what did she do to deserve all of this? Compared to other people she was good. WAS
'If life just treated me better' she thought, and again felt the pain.
Her life was dangerously simple. She was a simple woman with a simple life. She felt so normal yet wanted to be different. To be extra special. She hated her life for this. She was not pretty nor ugly, not rich nor poor, not intelligent nor dumb. She was a perfect example of an Ordinary person
Tears constantly falling from her swollen eyes unto the bed sheets wetting it. Holding her sobs so that her parents won't hear her. She was confused why the fuck she was crying. She didnt know what to do.
'I can't take it anymore. Take it away please' silently praying..
She didnt know what she was giving up. Her pain or life. She wanted to kill herself but too afraid of God. She knows it is an unforgiveable sin to commit suicide. She waited and waited to lose her breathe. Praying for God to take her life immediately
She can't handle it. It was pure hurt.
So painful..
She dialed her besfriend's number
"Hey, whats up?" huskily said the other line the moment he answered it. He was probably asleep before she called her
"P-please He-help me-e" she quiety said holding her sobs.
"Do you want me to come over or just talk it over the phone?" he casually asked. He was used to this crying. It was all normal to him.
"i-i dont know" she really dont know. She is confused. She didn't know what to tell him. she doesn't know the pain. It felt like it was born there. She was born sad. It was all normal to her but still so painful
"Wait for me. I'll be there. I'll hung up now just do your breathing exercises" He was so good to her. Why?
"T-hank you" shortly replied but didn't do what she was told. She cant calm down.
She was nothing special but his bestfriend treats her so precious. Why?
'Maybe he just pity me' she thought but she didnt care. All she needs was a person to be on her side. The existence of his bestfriend was nothing special to her. He was just a person who she thinks as 'Fake'.
She mean, how could someone be so good to her? She was even nothing to herself. Unworthy of everything. She knows he's faking the whole idea of the 'Caring Bestfriend' thingy. It was all because he was his bestfriend. He was just forced to be with her. He just didnt want to hurt her feelings more but he was sick of it.
Negativity was all over her head until their was a knock heard on her window.
She knows his bestfriend was outside. She didnt look and bother to stand and open the window for him. She was too exhausted of crying to get up.
Tears continues to fall on her bed. Stl Curled up and hugging herself tightly. She hated herself yet she hate the idea of her hating herself more. So she hugged herself like she doesnt want to lose the little hope inside of her. She was in th same position. A comforting position for her when she is all alone.
