Her Heart {Slow Updates}

Broken

"Stop it!"

*Slap*

I wonder if this relationship is really worth it.

"Noooo!"

I try my best to let it go, but I just can't bring myself to do it.

"Please Stop!"

He hurts me physically and emotionally.

"You Stupid Bitch!"

I don't know what I do to deserve this treatment.

"I'm sorry!"

*slap*

"I told you not to leave the house until I got here!"

What did I, Teresa T'Nae, do to deserve this?

I love him so much, and I know he loves me, but why does he do this to me.

I feel alone, broken, and hopeless, and there is no one who even cares.

My family doesn't want anything to do with me because of him.

He alienated me from almost everyone and everything that I truly loved... and yet I still seem to fall back into his trap.

Am I stupid? Or just confused?

..............

--The Following Morning--

I woke up to the sight of presents surrounding my bed. Aaron was not in his usual spot in bed next to me. I looked at the nearest gift that was enclosed in a pink box with a yellow ribbon around it.

'I love you' was written on the card.

Those faithful three words echoed in my head. Each time they are spoken, I find myself falling deeper and deeper into his trap.

Why? Why am I so stupid?

I shed a few tears, something I do often. I managed to get out of bed.. even though my body hurts. I HAVE endured worse.

Walking into the bathroom only made me feel worse. My reflection in the mirror was a reminder of every single blow to my body. I mentally winced at the memory.

I reached into the cabinet and grabbed a few pain killers. I said a small prayer and took them.

The bath water felt nice against my aching skin. I laid back and let my thoughts take over.

--30 Minutes Later--

"Teresa!"

He comes walking up the stairs. With every step, I could feel myself start to shiver.

"Teresa where you at?"

"I'm in the bathroom," I said in a shaky voice.

He walked in with a friendly looking smile.

I knew that there was still some good behind it.

"I brought you some more vitamins," he said.

I wouldn't need them if it wasn't for you.

"Thanks," I said faintly.

I feel like his heart will sink if I was to tell him how bad this hurts.

Probably not.

He kissed my forehead and left the room. I stepped out of the tub carefully. If this pain is a dream, I shouldn't have gone to sleep. I just wished this feeling was temporary.

He loves me.

I got dressed in comfortable clothing, put on enough makeup, and put everything up. I walked into the room and grabbed a blanket. That's the only warmth I have right now. I feel an urge to just take off running out of the front door, but I don't have the courage to do so.

I'm pathetic.

I need more than just gifts. His love is not enough for me.. but there is just something about him that draws me to him. It's like an unwilling attraction. It's strong and uncontrollable.

Who would have known that this was possible?

"Aaron, Can I visit my sister?"

She's all I have left.

"Why? You know she don't like me."

"I just want to talk to her."

He stepped close to my face.

"That bitch better not hear anything about last night. I will kick your ass."

I felt tears fill up in my eyes. I blinked them away and watched as he walked away. I left without a words, fearing what would happen if I said anything. After glancing at myself in the mirror, I drove off. I already know my sister is gonna be upset when she sees me.

She was already gone when I made it there. Shit. I forced myself to drive back home. He was sitting on the couch. Noticing me at the door, he motioned for me to come here. I slowly walked over to him. That look in his eyes was unreadable.

"You're still gorgeous."

I blushed a little.

"Too bad you're worthless."

My small smile faded. I was used to the insults. They still cut deep though.

"I'm hungry," he said pulling me into his lap.

"I'll cook," I said.

Before I could get up, he pulled me back down.

"I don't want any food," he said with a menacing smirk.

I inwardly cried, knowing what was coming. I felt his hands snake into my sweats. My tears threatened to fall, but him seeing me cry wouldn't help. Within a second, I was snatched up by the waist.

..........

I watched his chest move up and down next to me. My insides hurt and my legs are numb. I can't move.

Why won't he just leave Me? He wasn't always like this. It all started after the death of his son. He couldn't cope, so instead he took his anger out on me. I remember that night like it was yesterday.......

I watched him cry in my arms as his son was lowered into the ground. He blames himself because of who he chose to conceive with. She put their son out on the streets, and left him to die. That same night, I spotted him in the kitchen. He wiped his tears and  pulled out a bottle of liquor. He poured his first drink. I hated when he drank, and he knew it. He promised he would only have one glass, but one turned to two and then four and before I knew it, he was passed out in the kitchen sink. I woke up only to receive a slap in the face. He had never hit me before, but I could tell that it would not be the last time....

I should've left then, but a year later and I still remain getting battered and bruised up every single day.

The only thing that keeps me from leaving is fear. He would find me and then kill me. Maybe I will find happiness one day..

I doubt it.

.......

Teresa is in the MM.

-Shy Lee