I hardly have friends. I am always walking by myself and I realize that I guess people don't want to talk to me. When someone actually sees me they walk by me. Why? You see me alone just leave me alone. I feel like people do this out of sympathy not to just actually be my friend. I don't like it when people do it out of sympathy it makes me feel like I can't do anything to have friends. I just want it to stay that way. Sure people see me as a loner but they can't say smack about me. You can't talk smack about someone you hardly know or talk to. But sometimes being alone is the better option. You can't hurt anyone but your self and it's better that way. Sometimes when I'm out in the yard I just want to listen to music because music takes me to a different place. It doesn't give any emotion. It just makes me happy. It doesn't make me feel alone because I have my music. But sometimes I just want to be alone or just someone to just listen and understand me. I have nobody that could be that person for me. Sure I won't have to say what I feel but I have that pain on my chest and I just want to get it off by telling someone and I just want to cry it all out but I feel that I can't. I feel that if someone sees me cry they'll think that I'm weak and don't want people to think that. If you are reading this right now then you do probably think I am weak by writing my feelings on here thinking that a reader can understand how I feel
