We all have those days. The times when everyone isnt as interesting as they used to be. Or even better, isnt as interesting as you would have wanted them to be. You just wish you had the courage to tell the world to fuck off and leave you alone. But for the word alone to have a meaning you need other people right? Well today is one of those days for me. I have an exam tomorrow but have thought about not taking it more than five times. The laziness is getting to me. My dad always told me that the only bad thing about being smart is that you get to be lazy. Always thinking and never doing. Heck! I have been lazy for soo long that I don't think I am smart anymore. I feel just like everybody else. A useless, no life son-of -a-bitch. But it suprisingly makes me feel better. It reminds me that maybe i am human like everybody else afterall.
The sound of traffic keeps going on outside. I sometimes try to count the number of cars passing next to our cheap apartment on a cheap street. Life in Istanbul is'nt as good as I thought it would have turned out before getting here. I still look for the fun and adventure that my friends told me about more than two years ago. Reality can be a bitch sometimes.
I get out of my subconscious state of questioning back to reality. Oh shit! I think overslept again, the fifth time this week. And that means everyday of this week to be more exact. I dont really blame myself, life isn't all exciting anymore. It's like waking up next to the woman you don't like, who happens to be your wife. For those of you who havent woken up next to a woman or girl before, well lets just say its not all that enchanting. But to be honest I also wouldn't know.
I drag myself off my cheap bed and from my cheap coverings half asleep-or half awake-trying to push the sleep out of my body. But that motherfucker just never gives up. It clings to you the way a baby sloth clings to its mother; not too close, but not too far for you to foget about its presence.
