Little White Lies (Harry Styles)

Chapter 29

Lola's POV

'Lola?' Harry asks from beside me. We're currently lying on his bed, we just finished watching the film a few minutes ago and now we're just talking. I prop myself up, leaning on my elbow and facing him.

'yeah?' I ask, he mimicks my actions so that we're facing towards each other.

 'I don't know much about you, or your family.' He says, picking up a strand of my hair and twirling it around his finger before gently tucking it behind my ear.

 'I guess you don't'. I say, sighing, playing with the fabric of the sheets between us. He's silent for a few moments, I look up to see what the cause of it is and notice his eyebrows are raised, obviously waiting for me to say something other than no. I sigh heavily and lay on my back, staring up at the ceiling.

 'I'm not very good at opening up to people' I say timidly, playing with my fingers.

 'It's just me, baby' His words make my heart flutter and I am well aware of my blushing.

'What do you wanna know?' I ask, rolling over closer to him and snuggling up with his chest. He wraps his arm protectively around around me and kisses my forehead.

'You said you live with your parents so what abour your sist-' I cut him off.

'Harry I lied' I was well aware that I lied to him the time he came round my house. I told him that my parents were out, but I don't want to lie anymore. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

'I don't live with my parents. I live with my grampa. I haven't seen my mum and sister in almost 3 years.' I look down, not sure of what his reaction would be.

'How come?' He asks. His voice rumbles in his chest causing my head to slightly vibrate.

'Why is it that I so badly want to open up to you?' I ask, facing him. He chuckles lightly and interwines our fingers, his looking massive compared to mine.

'If you tell me about you, then i'll explain everything to do with me and Marie, or me and my step dad, or whatever you want to know. I understand it can be hard to explain to people what you don't really understand yourself, but it's a two way street here, we're both on the same ride'

Harry comforts me, running his fingers through my hair. I nod.

'You better get comfortable then, because if you want to know it all, its quite a long story. He chuckles and nods. I take a deep breath before begining the story, I hadn't ever told anyone this before, my grandad barely knew about my horrific childhood; I'm not sure whether it's because i'm embarassed, or part of me wonders whether I don't want people thinking badly of my mum or my dad before they've even met them, sometimes half of me feels as if there's a place in me that holds forgiveness in them, whereas the other half holds a large grudge on them, how could you blame me though.

'My mum and dad didn't get on, h-he wasn't a very nice person and used to hurt all three of us' I carry on, scared that once I stop, I won't be able to continue. 'He used to constantly treat us like we were his pets, his slaves. We used to get constant check ups by social services due to the bruises that the teachers saw on me and my little sister, freya. But each time, my mum lied for him.' Harry pulls away from me and kisses me hard on the lips. We both sit up, cross legged and facing each other. He nods for me to continue.

'One day, 3 years ago when I was 13. My dad had gone out, I don't know where, we knew better than to ask him. So I went off to school as usual, but my sister was ill, so she stayed at home with my mum. I came home from school that day. To find they were both gone. The house was empty of my mother and my sister's belongings. They had run away, and the worst part was that they had left me there, with him. My dad was so angry that for the next few weeks, there wasn't a time when he was sober! And each time, he would take all his anger and stress out on me. And there was no one there to help me.' I hadn't even realised I was crying until harry's fingers wiped the stray tear running down my cheek. 'I haven't heard from either my mum or Freya since. She will be 14 now.' I look down, deeply ashamed of my background.

'Why did you move here then?' Harry continues to ask questions but I don't want to get angry at him, I know he's just curious but I just feel as if I need to take it one question at a time, or a bit slower at the least.

'The next 3 years went painfully slowly without my mum and sister, and my dad didn't ever learn to control his temper. But he wasn't the only one that got himself into trouble. I got into the wrong croud at school, a gang. And alot of stuff happened to me that i'd rather not talk about' I was cut off from saying anything else.

'What happened?' He asked.

'Harry, its nothing' I lie, I don't want to tell him what happened because I'm scared he'll look at me differently or worse, just think it was damn right disgusting.

'Tell me' His face hardened and his voice became stern. I shook my head but he took my face in his hands and pressed our foreheads together.

'C'mon lola, baby' My heart swelled at the name baby, and before I even knew it, I was telling him.

'I-I was raped when I was 14' I say looking down, I was so embarassed. I had never told anyone this, but I'm not going to lie and say it's not good to let it out for once.

'No no no, tell me that didn't happen Lola, please tell me that didn't happen' He pleads, I don't say anything and before I can process whats even happening, i'm pulled into a bone crushing hug. 'I'm so sorry that nobody was there, you didn't deserve any of that!' he nuzzed his head into my shoulder, refusing to let my tears get the best of me. I rest both my hands on his chest and I immediately notice how tense they are.

'Harry it's okay now. It was 2 years ago' I say, kissing away the frown on his forehead.

'But surely it's given you a mental scar' He says, hands balled into fists at his sides. I wrap my smaller ones around them, in effort to calm him, and lucky it succeeds.

'Harry, we can get mental scars from walking down the street! Everybody goes through trauma throughout their life, mine just came earlier than a few others, and I guess you could say it was hard because I didn't have a motherly figure there that I could talk to. But it was okay, that way I became more independant and I knew that I had to get over it and move on' I say with quite alot of courage.

'I've never met any one like you before Lola Callaghan' He laughs.

'That's because there is only one Lola callaghan' I wink playfully. I poke both his dimples and he pecks my lips sweetly. Before I even realise what happening, i'm being pinned to the bed, a curly haired boy straddeling me. 'Get off me harry' I laugh uncontrollably when his abnormally long fingers begin to tickle my sides. When he sits up and off of me momentarily, I take advantage of the freedom of my legs and give him a playful shove with my feet causing him to tumble backwards, he stares at me for a few seconds and part of me is scared he'll flip, but when he bursts into fits of laughter I am happy to join in.

'Oh lola, this is just the begining' Harry says sternly before pouncing on me, his curly hair tickling my cheek and neck.