A Story From My Heart

PROLOGUE

It was a tiring day in the college. I was bored with the lecture and glanced outside. The lawn was filled with little wet grass. There was a watery sun outside in the sky. With the beginning of my college in second year of B.Com, it was also the beginning of rains and the beginning of never ending memories… past never leaves you. No matter how hard you try to let go, it always follows!
I had a past. It was more like a year of that past. The horrors began when I was younger, but the honors of a depressing present was done in that specific year, my ninth grade semester year. Coming back to my senses from these thoughts, I glanced at the professor who was lecturing about Money in Economics. I wasn’t interested in listening to that. College was boring. It reminded me of the happy times of my school. The bell rang indicating end of lecture and thus end of another day in college. I slowly picked up my bag and took out my smartphone from my pocket. I swiped the screen and I got 2 notifications. A Whatsapp message and one missed call from Akshay’s dad.
Akshay… my long lost friend, my brother, my bestie! It will be five years soon. Suddenly it all started replaying in my mind… Akshay, Janhvi, Mark and most of all Mishty… A hand touched my shoulder bringing me back to my senses. It was Anjali my college classmate. She had a crush on me I knew that because five years ago I had even behaved in the same way. But I had never showed to her that I knew what she felt about me. The truth was I somewhat liked her too, but was afraid of losing it.
“Are you okay Sairaj?” she asked me.
“Yes, I am fine.” I said turning away in process of hiding the tear which was about to flow down my eye. But the ever vigilant Anjali noticed it.
“My god Sairaj you are crying! What is the matter? Is everything okay at home?” she asked me. I nodded in affirmative. What else can I say to her? How can I tell her the very demons of my past haunt me every night! How can I tell her what has happened in my past? I simply couldn’t. Even if I started to tell her she would not understand. 
“Well, it’s okay if you don’t want to share with me. I don’t mean a lot to you I know that. It’s just I care a lot about you that I don’t want you to be sad.” Anjali said. She had turned sad. I remembered how I had told these lines to Mishty long, long, back.
She turned to go. I caught her hand just as she took a step. It was the first time I had touched her. Her hand was soft just like Mishty’s. She turned back again towards me now her big black eyes watery and expectant of answers. “I will tell you everything, just give me five minutes.” I told her. She nodded and we started towards the college cafeteria. On my way I called Akshay’s dad and told him I will be there soon. Akshay’s mom was pregnant again and her water had just broke, meaning she was in labour and she was due anytime today, so they were on the way to the hospital.
We sat on a small table in a corner. Anjali asked what I wanted to order and I just told her to get me a coffee. She went to bring the same for herself too. Even after me insisting to pay for both of us, she told me it was her treat and she would pay for both herself. I didn’t mind it since this was fine. It wasn’t the first time we both were having something together. We usually used to sit in the cafeteria together whenever I wanted her help in studies or when we had free time and we chitchatted. I normally didn’t take her that seriously in fear of falling for her. It was kind of a risk for me with everything at stake. She was crazy about me and I felt something for her but I acted like I didn’t feel anything for her. There were times when I would think why don't I give a damn to her! I looked over at her standing by the counter waiting for our order. Medium height, long black hair, big black eyes, fair skin and a cute smile. She had it all in her. She was as beautiful as she was smart and she was kind. I really didn't knew why we weren't together since she liked me that much.. She caught my eye when I was looking at her at the counter and smiled and picking up the tray headed towards me. She sat by my side and placed the tray on the table.
“So, do we start?” she asked sipping into the coffee with her straw. I was hesitant to start. I didn’t know if it would be great to let go this secret of mine out of me, but I looked into her big eyes and I saw the concern she had for me. Maybe I should let it go, after all everyone has his confident in someone. So I nodded and hence it started…

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