Convergent

Chapter 5

His dark hair glistens in the dancing light and his blue eyes are being swallowed by tears. I never thought I would be with Tobias like this again, on earth that is.

I'm standing in a small room that I'm guessing is his bedroom. There's a small bed in the corner of the room and a dresser just beside it. This must be his new house. I guess I succeeded in destroying the faction system. I'm glad I gave my life too help others live theirs.

"Why? God why?", Tobias says, "She was the only thing I truly loved. And you took her AWAY!", he grabs a glass that was on a near by table and chucks it at the wall and I watch it shatter. My heart begins to ache all over again.

Tobias is crying even harder now and all I'm doing is standing still. I need to hold him one last time, to let him know I'm okay. So I reach my hand out to touch his shoulder but, unsurprisingly, my hand slips right through him. My body buzzes with frustration when I pull my hand back unprepared for what happens next. The room suddenly is quiet, no sobs of grief, no screams of agony, just peaceful silence. Tobias isn't crying anymore and he is staring at his shoulder. Maybe my touch got to him, maybe he knows I'm here.

"Tris?", He whispers.

"Tobias," I say back, but I know he dosn't hear me.

"Tris, I love you so much, I know what you did was brave and selfless, but what about me?" I hear his voice crack as he try's to hold back the tears, "I miss you,Tris. I wish it would have been me. I should have died and you should have been the one that was safe. I'm so sorry."

Now I'm crying and I just want him. He has it all wrong. It's not his fault that I chose to give my life, that was something I decided to do. But only now am I realizing that he will always believe he could have always done something that could have saved me. And that tears me apart piece by piece.

I bite my lip and look towards the window and realize it started raining. I don't know why but something about it feels funny to me. I wipe my tears off my cheek and try to stop crying and focus on this feeling I have inside me. Then it hits me. When I was crying It was raining, and now that I'm not crying it has stopped raining.

I'm controlling the weather right now.

"Tris, Tris please," Tobias says interrupting my thoughts, "Send me a sign that you can hear me right now. I can't go on without having one last goodbye."

What do I do now? I have to show him I'm here and that I care. I start to cry again and the rain outside hits the window every time a tear slides down my cheek. How can I give him one last goodbye?

I think I know.

I wipe away my tears again (I don't think I have cried this much in one day before) and inhale deeply. Then silently and swiftly I release my breath. But it wasn't that simple. This breath wasn't just carbon dioxide being released in to the air. It was so much more then that. This was a whisper full of sorrow and regret, hope and courage, love and longing, forgiveness and grief, inspiration and happiness. All these things released in just one breath. And it was my goodbye.

As soon as it left my lips a small gust of wind went through the room.

I watched as the soft breeze fell upon his cheek and he knew it was my breath telling him I'm here and I loved him.

Tobias lifted his head up and touched his cheek while a look of surprise sprang across his face. This expression slowly turned into a look of understanding and passion. I knew my plan worked when a small smile played across his face and I seen tears whelm up in his eyes.

"I love you too," Tobias whispers, "See you soon stiff,"

"I'll be waiting for you," I say, as I lean in for one last goodbye kiss, but then I remember I will just slip right through him, so I stop inches away from his face.

A shot of pain shoots through me as I stare at his lips. I just want one last kiss, one last touch. I need him. I lean closer unable to stop myself and our lips touch. My lips hit something solid, something I was not expecting. I lean in more and open my eyes. Tobias is holding me to him pressing his soft lips to mine. I can feel his wet cheek and I raise my hand to wipe away his tears. He kisses me for a long time and I let him, I don't want to say goodbye, not yet.

I can't. After what feels like forever we pull apart and he puts his hand on my cheek.

"Tris?", he says, "Is it really you?"

"Yes," I answer, "Tobias, it's me"

"I'm so sorry Tris, I love you." He looks like he just saw a ghost, which he kinda has.

"It's okay Tobias, I'm sorry too. I love you. I will see you soon okay?"

"Okay." He says absorbing all of me In for one last time.

Without a warning a tugging feeling spreads across my shoulders and a bright light blinds me. When my eyes adjust I see I'm standing in that little white box again looking down at Tobias. But this time instead of seeing a heartbroken boy, I see a boy who looks a little stronger. And that is all that matters.