I Love You (Boy X Boy)

Chapter 7: Past

WARNING: There is a scene with a mild rape description. It isn't a full description. If you are a victim of rape or violence of any kind I have labeled the paragraphs so you can skip. Skip paragraph 4. Happy reading and remember to talk to someone about your abuse. it'll feel better once you get it out.

    Two years ago I met him. I had no friends and my social life was lacking. I did talk to some other kids that seemed cool but they weren't people I'd really want to be friends with. School was never really easy for me, but then again who is it ever easy for. I make my way through the halls, always oblivious to the world around me. I never stop walking because if I do it'll only bring problems for me. You see just because I try to convince myself I'm not gay doesn't mean everyone, or Kendall for that matter, will do the same. Kendall Michaels was my number one enemy, but most would call him a bully. He was never the brightest crayon in the box, so in the midst of calling me gay, he did gay things. Things like touching my butt and making whistles noises when I come around. Things I would never do to another guy if I wasn't gay, which I'm not. I was scared of him. Me being afraid is probably why the most horrific things happen to me. I hadn't seen it coming that day and I wish I had. It was my freshman year at Fargo high and I was excited to be in a new school. New faces meant no one knew my past.

   I had asked my father to get me Pink converse and a Orange hoodie to look cool. My sense in style was so off because when I walked in, not a single boy was wearing pink or purple. I thought to myself, how could anyone live without color? They were all in black or white and blue jeans. I felt special because I was wearing my favorite green skinny jeans. But that feeling slowly melted as I continued to walk the halls. Boys stared at me in disgust, girls laughed and pointed fingers. Someone slapped my butt and several people started to snicker. Everyone I came into contact with was disgusted, except for Peter. Peter was my first friend and first love. Alas, I admit it, I was in love with a boy. But Peter wasn't an ordinary boy, he was kind and loving. He was my friend when no one else was. 

"So your new right," he said that first day we met." I'm Peter."

"I'm Marcus, " I said.

"Are you lost? I could help you around," he said. I smiled brightly.

"I'd like that," I said. We start walking down the hall together still catching stares. Some people come and give Peter a fist pump. I'm guessing he's popular around here. The only thing that I thought was strange was that some random kid winked at Peter and he nodded back. I watched as the boy went to another group and they started passing money around. I didn't think much of it then but now I wish I had. 

"So where'd you move from?"

"Chicago."

"Really! fascinating," he said." so did you witness any gun violence?"

"No. I'm kind of an introvert," I said.

"Oh so you never got out much," he said smiling. 

"No, I didn't, " I said.

"I was new too," he started."I moved here from New York. The Bronx. They had a lot of gun violence up there. Especially in my neighborhood."

"Wow that must've been hard," I said. He chuckles and nods his head.

"You have no idea." 

     We quickly warmed up to each other into what I thought was a friendship. But it was only for his personal gain. He made me comfortable enough to go places alone with him. I had no idea that he was a threat. And I would soon learn to trust myself and no one else. 

   One day Peter asks me to meet him after lunch in the gym locker room, that he has to tell me something. Blinded by my crush on him I go to meet him. He's sitting alone on the bleachers.