chapter 1
the lake was the perfect idea besides the fact that it was about twelve am and the middle of november. fuck it i needed the break from my everyday stress so left. i had no car but that was ok because the lake was only a coulple streets down. i started to walk, the way that the cool wind touched my neck it was perfect. the sound of the gravel under my feet. there is one dim street light on my street. i like it because it lets the moonlight really show. when i walked it almost seamed that the flowers turned. i have never really been somone that people like ,i have always be an outcast. by time i got to the lake it was just perfect the moon light bounced of the water. the water was like a big bowl of glitter. i took my shirt and pants off so i was only in my bra and underwear it felt right. i put a foot in the water it was freezing but i did not care so i went inch by inch deeper and deeper i was all the way in after a moment. i went under, the water covered me i felt so free. but i did not know that i was alone there was a boy sitting on the bench right across from me. he had dark brown hair bold cheek bones and the fullest lips ever. they were dark on the inside and lighter on the out side. "how long have you been watching me" i asked. "as long as you have been here". he said in a quite frail voice. i was not shocked by his remark i really did not mind so i keep swimming he just sat there and looked so peacful. i thought i only swam for an hour but the sun started to rise i payed no attention to him he just was there by time the sun was almost up above the hill. i looked back to see if he was there to my amassment he had dissappered. i need to get home i got out and grabbed my clothes and left. i walked down the same street in my bra and underwear. that same dim street light stood. i looked up from the gravel and looked at the top of the street to hope to see the boy, he was not there. i got home changed my clothes. just had a normal day i found myself looking out the window to hopfully see the boy. he did not show up at all. im really not to sure what made me think of him so much, i was lusting after him. "how could i lust over him i dont even know his name".i tryed to forget and i managed for about an hour. i thought all day about this voice it sounded in pain but at the same time scared .
