One Pebble Two Stones | bellarke

1

-{Clarke's POV}-

I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity." Edgar Allen Poe, one of the few writers we were taught on the Ark. Home was so far. The earth I stand on now has only gave me troubles of affliction and insanity. My mother told me to be good, a leader with control. Even with control, nothing of my choice is right.

The oxygen is my body tightens as I can't breath. So many memories lost, crushed because of him. I glance towards my right shoulder and look at Bellamy. His dark hair pulled in front of his ears and his lips curled into a cheeky smirk once he reached looks with me.

Though that grin on his lips holds feelings of chaos. He destroyed the only chance of contacting the ark. Bellamy Blake ruined everyones chance of talking to her and his family.

"Bellamy!" I yelled grasping his attention. He runs over toward me giving me the same deceiving grin he always had.

"Yes princess... What honor do I have to awake your heinous."

He sarcastically bows down to my knees. I look down at him giving him the notification that I'm serious.

"Bellamy you know that you destroyed the only way of contacting the ark, right?"

"Clarke, I told you already Raven is looking for the radio and once she finds it you and your boyfriend can save the world."

He emphasizes the boyfriend part which bugs me. Ever since Raven and Finn kissed I got the reality. Finn belongs to Raven and I'm in no condition to be in the middle that. I really liked Finn. And if push comes to shove I would dare to say he liked me too. But 'liked' is past tense so no more of him and I.

"He's not my boyfriend", I state. "...and what if the radio is unfixable? You threw it in the river Bellamy, there's no way a old fashioned radio can survive that type water damage."

He grabs my wrist and pulls me into a tent. It clearly wasn't his tent. It was covered in drawing of the sun, moon, and stars. Lots and lots of stars. Still not letting go of wrist he pulls me closer and looks me dead in the eyes.

"You and I both know if Chancellor Jaha comes down he will kill me. Octavia doesn't have anyone Clarke!"

Bellamy's tears fall past his face and into the dirt ground making droplets of dark circles form on the floor. Octavia has grown so much since the thirteen days we've been on earth. She has had her first taste of freedom. Bellamy is still looking at the ground frightened with emotions of worry, love, and confusion.

"You'll be okay Bellamy. I know you will"

I give him one last glance and murmur under my breath "I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity."

"What?" Bellamy questions.

"Edgar Allen Poe. It means that with all the insanity in your mind and long understanding of things, it could never even out".

I leave the tent quietly hoping he doesn't notice my own tears streaming down my face. Everything is gone. Hope for survival, Finn, dad, and maybe mom. I couldn't bare to continued the list of things I've lost since I've been born. My steps lead me back to my tent. My body dropped to the floor where I lay thinking and wishing that I could just fly away.