Cowboy, Stay with Me

Chapter Twenty-Two: Surprise!

As soon as they got into the motel room, Sean was all over her.

She giggled as she half-heartedly fought off his advances, but when he had her backed up almost to the bed and had started sliding the zipper down on the back of her dress, she stopped him.

He obediently came to a halt, of course, he would never, ever push her about sex.

Hands at her waist, he gazed searchingly into her eyes. "What is it, Lucille? What's wrong?"

She stepped back from him, but only ended up bumping into the side of the bed. "Sean, look, we really need to talk. As much as I just want to jump back into bed with you and not think about anything, I just...I can't do this with you, Sean. Please understand that?"

Her eyes filled with tears and she swiped at the undersides impatiently, not wanting her makeup to run. This was why she hated confrontation of any kind, she was so darn sensitive and always started to cry like an idiot at the slightest hint of emotional conflict. Her mother had been the same way.

He cocked his head, bemused. "Do what?"

She gestured wildly between them both. "This! Whatever this is, it's not fair to me. Because in the end, the fundamental problem still does and always will stand between us! I want a big family someday, Sean, and you don't."

###

Sean's dark eyes slowly narrowed. "How do you know what I want?"

"Sean, don't jerk me around. Not about this."

He took one step, firmly, closing the distance between them so that they were almost nose-to-nose. "I'm not. Lucy, I love you. I'm not gonna let you go this time, alright? I want this, I want you. And I know having a big family has always been in your plan, it clearly hasn't changed...so I'm willing to consider it, if you're willing to consider maybe forgiving me? And then maybe just, like I said, taking it slow; maybe we could date casually? Exclusively, of course." He was smiling, sensing victory in the distance.

She bit her lip. He didn't get it and she didn't know quite how to tell him.

"Sean...the last time we, you know, had sex?"

He grinned and nodded. "Yes, honey?"

"Well, it was kinda impulsive and a little...maybe a little reckless?"

His eyebrows twitched together momentarily, then she watched all the blood drain from his face as understanding finally dawned.

###

"Sean, please say something." She begged in a low whine.

Sean blew out a breath, running a hand back through his black hair. "But...I just assumed you were on birth control, or that you would've stopped me."

She flushed. That's how it had been before they had broken up; she'd been on the pill, but sometimes they'd been in a little too much of a hurry to always use a condom.

"It was a crazy couple days; that's no excuse, I know, but it's the only one I have. Every time...I just...I didn't even think..."

"Have you taken a test yet?"

"No, not yet. I was gonna wait 'till Monday, to, you know, give it a little time...?"

Sean took a deep breath, raking his fingers back through his hair. "I just can't believe this, Lucy. How could you have-? I trusted you. This is so unlike you, to be so reckless about something this important! I mean, if I didn't know any better..."