I am just writing this with a simple idea in mind. Lately i have been enjoying the series Vikings which follows Ragnar Lothbrok and his family. And with all that it has me constantly thinking more and more about myself. One of the things i have been thinking about is my desires. My desires have always been the same, the first was notoriety, the second to travel, and the third to conquer.
Notoriety came about with the idea that i always wanted to be known. Known for anything, like the great kings and rulers of old. I wanted to be respected among my peers, its why i seek out fights, its why i get good grades and study so hard. I wish to be known for something, "The Ruthless, The Brute, The Lionheart, The Great" anything of that sort. I hate being nameless, not being known. In this world how many rich people do you know, not many i imagine. Bill gates? Oprah? Ya, they are rich and public but there are many who are rich that we do not know. I desire a name that rings through the annuls of history with both awe and fear!
The desire to travel. This desire came to me in my teenage years, i have always loved the idea of just traveling. Never worrying about anything and discovering the world as it is. So many of us stay in the places of our birth, so many of us are okay with who and what we are. So ignorant of the world around us. I desire to see it, to travel it, to explore places no man has ever been. I desire to explore and learn, not be cooped up in a cage like i am. All so my family can bask over my greatness. What have i accomplished? I have gone to college and easily become a top student but its nothing. I have no stories to tell, no people i have met.
The last is conquest, this desire came to me as a man grown. I have always loved history, Charlemagne being my favorite character in history. A man who united so much, i desire to be like him. To bring a world split apart under one flag. Through great battles or diplomacy. To travel beyond and conquer the stars. To conquer and unite all. The idea of being powerless is so sickening i near vomit at the idea. The idea that man has become so complacent with our lives today that we have forgotten what we are. We do not seek war, many say i am crazy for this. simply because i have never seen war and its a terrible place. But we as a species have always benefited and survived off conquest and war. We are not a peaceful species. And a desire burns deeply in me to unearth those roots.
With this i sit here everyday, i am the top of my class, working toward getting my own place. A beautiful woman by my side, and the world at my feet. But so little of that world is truly bowing before me. I want to do more then average, i want to give my future children a story to tell. A story of how there father conquered, never sat around, always followed his desires. Yet here i sit, working hard. Hoping that something will fall into my lap...
