Ready to Die - Warrior Pacts Book 1

Chapter 1

Grief washed over me. It consumed me. It enveloped me and drowned me in the swirling cacophony of waves that were goodbyes. 

I sat in my room, but refused to cry. Mama and Bradley needed me, so I had to be strong now that papa was gone.

Just thinking about him brought back the despised wetness behind my eyes that conveyed weakness. I could not be weak. I would not. 

I wiped the tears that had escaped from my cheeks as someone climbed the creaky attic stairs to what little space was called my room. The door creaked open and mama's face appeared, hair meticulously prepared, and clothing the same dull grey ruffle skirts. 

"Come downstairs immediately. There are matters we need to discuss." The door shut behind her. 

I was sure my mother hated me. She had never showed it the way she loves my brother, much less said it. She always had a sour look spread across her face, like she was tasting lemons. I didn't know why, and quite frankly I didn't care; I was used to it by now. I had given up a long time ago, trying to have any sort of relationship with the woman who bore me. 

Sighing, then pulling my hair in a quick ponytail, I started down the rotten stairs, avoiding all the creaks. I neared the bottom and heard my mama's voice fill the air as she sung to Bradley. She had never sang to me. Not even once.

The lyrics haunted and soothed at the same time, and soon my baby brother was asleep. 

Her eyes gazed lovingly at the sleeping child, and her hands brought the blanket up until it was snuggled underneath his chin. Such love filled the woman's eyes, and realization hit me as I realized my papa would never look at me that way again. 

Then the woman's eyes flitted to me and the light died, her eyes empty once again. 

"Sit." The word rung out through the cold, wooden cabin. 

I sat.

She cleared her throat and began, "Now that your papa is gone, there are certain matters at hand that I will no longer be able to take care of." 

This couldn't be good. "What do you mean, mama?"

"I have decided this is no longer the right place for me to be." 

The arrow struck its target and knocked me to my knees. She was leaving. 

My gaze rested on my feet. "Where will we go?"

Her eyes bore into my skull, yet I remained looking at my feet. She hated it when I did that. "There is no we. Where I will go is for me to know." Her empty voice spoke. 

"Mama." The sound that came out of me was only a whisper. 

"I am not your mama." Her empty eyes were not empty anymore. They were filled with rage as she spoke, "I will be leaving this evening. Goodbye Alex." And with that she picked up her lace skirts and hustled out the door to pack her things.

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The forest was really the only place I could be myself.

Thrusting my bow and arrow back into their place, I trudged through the chilly spring dew to meet Josiah. I thought he was one of the two people who understood me, but I was about to find out just how wrong that thought was.

I approached the clearing where we had first met Josiah, and saw him sitting there whittling away while he'd waited. He always did that, I found it cute.

He wore his hunting gear, as did I; but his were far more expensive of course. His light blond hair wavered slightly in the cold air but his gait was happy as he sauntered towards me.

Dark brown eyes warmed as he saw me. 

My face lifted as I looked into the familiar comfort of his face.

Every Forlayan youth received a Sense when they turned 18. It was supposed to be what defined us. There were four Senses. Disappearance was the ability to make objects disappear and was the most common Sense. Expansion was the ability to make any object, living or dead, grow or gain mass. Extraction is the Sense that allows a person to shrink an item. Extraction and Expansion were equally common, but not as heard of as Disappearance. Then there was Creation. It was almost completely unheard of, and required a great deal of power. It gave the user the talent of creating any object that the brain thinks of. 

"What's wrong?"

"I... I don't know where to start..." My voice shook more than it should've.

He seemed conflicted with something, but his eyes flashed with worry when mine filled with tears. 

"I came to tell you something, Alex." Nostalgia filled his voice, a tone I was all too familiar with. 

"Go on, Jo." He flinched at the nickname. Weird. 

Shaking his head at flinching, he sighed. " I'm sorry Alex, I came to tell you that I can't keep doing this anymore. The sneaking around, it won't work anymore. My mother would like me to marry a woman of...of stature, to secure the family inheritance. And it would be too difficult to convince them to marry you." He meant my social status. We were very poor, and unfortunately that would hurt their family reputation. 

I couldn't believe this. Not Josiah too! 

First my papa, then mama, and now Josiah. This wasn't happening. 

"Alex..?" His voice was laced with worry, yet that sourness overpowered it. 

"Yes Josiah, I completely understand." My voice wavered slightly, and I inwardly cursed. 

The hurt was so obvious in his eyes, it took every inch of my muscles not to lean over and kiss him. My Jo. 

But after a few seconds, I caved to my desires and reached for his face the same time he crushed his lips to mine. 

The kiss was hot and full of passion yet pain. Desire yet melancholy. 

Somehow we had gotten closer and now I was cuddled to his chest. My hands were fisted underneath my neck as I let the tears take over. I would never ever see him again here. And when I would see him, he'd have married another girl. 

This was too much. I pulled back, ignoring his voice calling me back to where I belonged. I raced out of the grove, my heart fracturing and scattering over the path I left behind. Though I ached to pick the pieces up, I didn't look back. Not even once. 

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