Dear Friend,
I'm writing to you for two reasons. The first is because they told me you were good and understanding. The second is because I need too and even thought this may sound kinda like another book I still want to do it. Don't be mad but like the other book the names in this will be different. Not because I don't trust you but because I don't think you should know. Today started off like any other day. It's summer now and I'm not really sure why I'm writing too you, being as how you will be doing things and you may be too busy to open this. I guess I just wanted to start this off somewhere. Someone told me about you and so here I am. They said you helped. I haven't really had many people that help so I hope you will. I guess life for me has been pretty bad up to now. I remember the old days when everything was so much easier. Now it's all who slept with who or who left who. You know I never really realized that teenagers are bad people. We are capable of breaking so many hearts. Of cheating or stealing or even doing drugs. Last year was long and opened me up to all of those things. See I guess I think a lot. I don't know why but I do more than I talk. I guess I think because the worlds full of stupid people and because even though I can't speak my thoughts I can still think them which I guess is reason enough. Anyways all year I kept to myself the important things. The things that really mattered that were worth speaking. Like when I could of called that girl a bitch when she needed to be called one. I don't know why but I did. I guess because I was scared. Because I cared too much? I could of told that girl how I really felt. I could have hit the guy who asked my friend for pictures. Maybe I was scared I'd get hit back or face retaliation. Looking back I don't think I would of and if I had called that girl a bitch or hit that guy then I would be better than I was and am. I used to be bad though. I don't know why, maybe because of the idea of helping a friend who was about to put me through the same things that person was going through. I don't know exactly why but that's that just a guess. See I used to have a friend who went through things that a person doesn't go through. Depression is a war my friend used to say. Looking back on it my friend really didn't need my help. I think it may have been for attention because my friend was beautiful and social and strangely sexy. I hate how these days you consider yourself crazy if you do weird stuff. Also the whole people thinking they have trust issues and the antisocial thing. Being antisocial isn't something you flaunt, it's something your ashamed of and that you wish you could overcome. And these days people trust others too easily. Having any kind of issue isn't something you share with the world. And don't cut yourself and tell everyone you can because that not good. Harming yourself for attention which is what I think my friend was doing. I will probably never be sure because that friend no longer likes to talk to me. I don't know what I did exactly but whatever it was I miss my friend. I learned it's easy to lose the one thing you trust the most nowadays. Thinking now I think I should tell you a person I trust a lot. His name is John LaBorde. He's a lot like me but in ways that I don't think any body else will ever be able to really see. He may be completely openly the opposite of me but I feel like we might be the same person. He's a freshman like me and next year we're going to be Sophomores at our school in our town or at least in his town. I haven't spoken to a lot of my friends except for John since school ended and I hope that doesn't continue because I really miss school. I know people are celebrating right now but school isn't hard and it's actually pretty fun. I don't get why people are always so sad about it I mean put school in a rational manner. Almost every person you know and love are coming together in one building to learn and progress in their future. I really think the only bad thing about school is the drama. See drama brings me back to my statement about teenagers. I don't get why it matters who slept with who or why kissed who or whatever. But as humans we insist on making things complicated. Just certain things that we want to complicate though, not things that are out of our control. I hate to contradict the saying we insist on complicating life but we don't. See we're humans and as humans we make mistakes. We don't mean or insist on making anything complicated but it just happens and it's not a good thing that something like that happens but sometimes bad things are good, not because we learn from the bad things but because the bad things can help us know what the good things are. I don't know if that makes sense to you but I hope it does. But anyways I really do miss school and all my friends and that girl that I used to make smile. I guess I am kind of a flirt but I haven't dated ever girl there is and I hate when people said I have because that's a ridiculous statement. No-one ever wants to hear about what I have to say about the statement thought because in truth I've only had 4 girlfriends this entire year and I do admit that's a lot ,but it's definitely not every girl. It's not like I plan to date these girls either, it just happens, but I do plan to change that because now I'm going to actually look at who I want to be with. I want someone who will want me as much as I want them, but that's going to be extremely hard to find, but I do promise to try my best and to pray every night. I already think I've found someone but I'm not going to say anything because i shouldn't and because I can't. I need to stop depending on other's for my happiness and learn how to fend for myself. Anyways I have to go now, but I promise to write as soon as I can.
Sincerely,
Me
