Feral (Gabentine Fic)

I've Become So Numb

People have become worried about me. I walk around with bags under my eyes from lack of sleep, my voice is hoarse from the screaming I do when I have nightmares, and my face shows no emotion. My body has become numb and I find times where I keep quiet more times than I speak. Me and Kate have become closer and sometimes when I have a bad nightmare, she comes in and tells me a story about Gabe from his younger days.

The stories help me and Kate just being near me makes me feel wanted and loved. Me and Lee still talk and hang out but, he seems to be avoiding me these days and I can't figure out why. Maybe he feels responsible for Gabe's death and my depression? Or maybe he's ashamed of the emotionless robot I have become.

That's all I am now. A fucking robot. And it's just because I fell for a guy who can turn into a wolf and then was killed by his own father.

I do still go on runs and the only one I want to go on runs with is Kate. She seemed to be fine with going with me and we usually go on one day runs. On days I don't go on runs, I'm helping Kate out in the kitchen or checking all the cell blocks for any walkers that may have sneaked in.

Helping Kate and her helping me has made time go by a little quicker. I didn't even realize that it was a month since I found out about Gabe's death but, Kate surprised me with a cupcake on night. She said Gabe would always eat a cupcake on his birthday because he said he couldn't eat a cake by himself. I split the cupcake in half and gave one half to Kate and we both munched on them in silence. A question had been on my mind all week and I finally decided to go for it.

"Kate?"

"Mmm?"

"Did you know about the wolf thing?"

Kate paused wiping her hands off and nodded her head.

"Yes, I've known since he was younger. David had claimed that Gabe would be like him and that we should just kill him because Gabe might lose control and kill us. Mariana wasn't like them because of something with her genes. I begged and pleaded for David not to but, he wouldn't listen. The next day, David tried finding Gabe but this was the day that the world went crazy. David ran away and left us with Javi and he took good care of us. I later told Javi about Gabe and he believed me because he had seen David transform when he was younger. We helped Gabe become ready when it was time for him to turn but, he turned the night Mariana was killed by another wolf and Gabe fled."

Kate smiled at me as she finished and hugged me.

"You're the first person Gabe trusted enough to let you see him transform. Did you freak out?"

I laughed a little as I recalled the night Gabe showed me his other side.

"I fainted when I found out that human Gabe and wolf Gabe were the same."

Kate let out a laugh before her watch beeped, signaling that it was midnight.

"Oh wow, it's getting pretty late. I'm going head to bed and you should too, we have a run tomorrow and this time I'm finding a chocolate bar."

I rolled my eyes playfully at her as she left and I laid down on my bed, trying to go to sleep for tomorrow. Minutes passed and I huffed in annoyance because I couldn't fall asleep. Everyone else would probably be asleep now so, I can go for a walk without being seen. I put on a pair of sweats and some shoes before hoping out of bed and down the hall. The prison was silent and kind of freaked me out band made me walk even faster to the exit. As I stepped outside, a breeze drifted on through and it made me shiver. Although spring was right around the corner, the winter season just didn't seem to want to leave.

The moon was big and bright in the sky as I walked around the prison yard and other buildings. My mind was blank throughout my entire walk and it was refreshing. I eventually found myself stopping at the place where David was blown to smithereens and looked at the ground. Grass was beginning to grow back from where the explosion was but, there was still some bare spots. I began walking around again before my foot kicked something metal. I looked down to see a shiny object and bent down to retrieve it.

Holy shit. It's the key David had in his hands.

It was light in my hand but, held a certain heaviness to it. Just as I was going to go back inside and lay back down, a loud bang came from the left of me. My eyes darted around the dark to try and see what made that noise and they landed on the building with barbed wire around it. My feet had a mind of their own as they started walking towards it to see what caused the commotion. Before I knew it, I was standing at the heavy looking door and was about to try the handle when a voice called out to me.

"Clementine! Don't open that!"

I jerked away from the door as if it were on fire and looked to see Lee jogging over to me. My hand automatically slid the key in my pocket before he could see it. Lee came closer to me and tried the door. It didn't budge meaning that it was locked and he let out a relieved sigh. I crossed my arms over my chest and glared at Lee.

"What's in there, Lee? And why is it locked?"

Lee grabbed ahold of my arm and started taking me back to the prison.

"Nothing of your concern, Clementine. And it's locked for our safety. Why are you wandering around at one in the morning?"

I jerked my arm out of his grasp and held it to myself.

"I can walk myself back. And I couldn't sleep so I went for a walk."

Lee returned my glare and pointed toward the prison entrance, not giving me any chance to argue. I looked once more at the barbed wire building before walking inside and going to bed.

What is he hiding from me?