Maybe I Can Never Fly

Girl Meets Evil

I woke up in the hotel room, regretting the words I said to my mother the night before.

"You little shit," I told her. "I fucking hate you."

I woke up in beads of sweat and guilt. I looked over to the clock that read "9:30" and rolled onto my back. Sighing I got up from the bed and worked my way out and to the bathroom.

I stripped once I closed the bathroom door and quickly got in when the cold air kissed me harshly.

Rains of regret showered me cruelly and tears of pain rolled down my face. How am I going to mend this? I barely have anything with me. I have to go back at some point. I need a job if I'm not going back. Maybe I can sneak in? I always keep my window unlocked, just in case my parents forget about me.

How can a parent forget their own child? I was their own flesh and blood and yet they tossed me around like utter trash. I don't understand why they'd do such things.

The shower of guilt became bitter and undesirable. I forced myself out the bathroom before I tried to do unspeakable things.

The cold, disgusting air embraced my body as I stepped out the shower.

I shivered as I slid into my black leggings. I instantly feel better as the tight bottoms hugged my body. I tugged my slightly dirty sweatshirt over my head and fixed it in place.

Feeling as if everything in the world was mended, I flopped onto the hotel bed once more. I scrolled through Instagram and liked everyone's posts, as I do every morning. I log into ARA and see that I haven't missed a single day in 108 days. I smile. I've never been so passionate about something as I have with this.

Damn, it feels good. I've never gotten to accomplish much in life so far, I'm only fifteen after all. But yet, I still wish I could do so much more in life. I want to do something that will shake the world. That will leave everyone breathless. I just haven't decided what that something is quite yet.

Taking a turn to my right, I look back at the clock. 10:00. What am I supposed to do for the day. There's no school, its only Saturday. It's not like I can practice anything. Everything is at home. If you could even call it home.

Sighing, I picked myself back up from the bed and dial my closest friend Danny. He's a pretty chill guy and he's the only real friend I have. Not like those so-called "friends" are. He's like a big brother to me. Then again so does every other guy I meet.

"Hey, Danny," I started. "Are you free right now to talk?"

"Yeah, sure," Danny replied. "What's up? I just hung up on your parents. Where are you?"

"Hotel," I sighed. "I need some advice. I assume you know what happened last night then?"

"Yeah, your mom blamed me again. But you know that always happens."

"Fuck her man," I cursed. "She's just a bitch. I'm sorry, I know you don't like cursing. But damn that woman pisses me off."

"It's alright, kid " he reassured. "But what do you need help with?"

"I need some advice," I told him. "I really can't stand being at home anymore, but I know that I have to go back at some point. I don't know what to do."

"I keep telling you that if you ever need a break, you're always welcome at the dorm."

"Yeah, staying with four sweat guys in barely half of an apartment, sounds great," I scoff sarcastically. "But really, what do I do? I need to get out of that place, it isn't good for my health. I feel like dying every day when I'm there. But I can't leave. My mom would throw a fit."

Danny sighed through the phone, "Well, theres a couple of things you could do."