Cowboy, Stay with Me

Chapter Twenty-Five: Father Material

Lucy finally came out of the bathroom, after the longest three minutes of her life. Sean had kindly decided to wait in the bedroom and not actually watch her; too good of him really.

He had been pacing the floor in agitation, but he ceased at once when the bathroom door opened.

She slowly raised her eyes to his face and he saw a certain lack of urgency in her face and posture.

"It was negative." She said softly. "I'm not pregnant."

Sean took a moment to process this, then he grinned and swept her into a hug. "That's great, darlin'." He kissed the side of her head then set her back from him, still grinning.

She, on the other hand, was shocked at the amount of disappointment she felt settling over her.

These last few days...she had let herself believe it might be true; had imagined life growing inside her, had indulged in fantasizes about having a baby of her own. Sean's baby.

She knew that it was best if she wasn't pregnant, but now that she knew she wasn't, all she felt was...empty.

Lucy settled her hands over her abdomen, over her empty womb, and Sean finally noticed her downcast mood.

"What's wrong?" He asked her, rubbing her arms in an attempt to lighten her spirits now.

She pulled back from him, making him frown to cover up how hurt lanced through him.

He slowly exhaled. He thought he knew what was bothering her, though. "Look, Lucille, I'm really sorry for what I said to you last time we talked. When you told me about the possible accidental pregnancy...I didn't exactly react well."

She folded her arms and arced her eyebrows at him in booming silence.

"Okay, I was a total jerk. I'm sorry, honey, I really am. I know you would never do anything that vile and manipulative as to try to get accidentally knocked up."

She arched her eyebrows higher and he hung his head in repentance, not something that came easy to the proud cowboy.

"Do you think you can ever forgive me?" He raised his eyes to hers, and right on cue, Lucy's eyes threatened to fill with tears. She did her best to battle them back.

"Sean, this just isn't working." She told him, releasing a shaky inhale.

He cocked his head, confused. "What? What's not working?"

"This. This whole 'taking it slow and casual' thing? Who are we fooling, Sean? It's just gonna happen all over again; we'll have fun, we'll get closer, I'll fall madly in love with you, and then we're just gonna stumble upon the same exact problems; your dangerous career, the things you can't tell me, your long hours, the constant threat to your freaking life, let's not forget.

"Oh, and then the clincher; I want a big family. You hate kids."

Sean folded his arms and began to frown. "That's so unfair, Lucy. And I do not hate kids, I'm just kinda...scared of them.

"Look, can we just rewind a little bit?"

But just then her cellphone rang, blaring a Miranda Lambert song, and she answered it without hesitating.

"Oh, hi, Paula." Lucy turned away, to go to the window while she talked with her step-mother.

Sean sighed in defeat as he watched her walk away from him.

###

Lucy groaned as she got off the phone with Paula. "Ugh, that woman." She vented, and Sean raised his eyebrows.

It wasn't like her to speak ill of anyone. Lucy was a loving, nonjudgmental person who liked most everybody. She was a people-pleaser and she rarely ever had a cross word to say about anyone.

Only two people in the entire world seemed to really set her off, pushing her buttons just so.

Sean himself and her step-mother, Paula Ramirez Davenport.

"She was reminding me about Cassie's bridal shower and the bachelorette party next weekend, ugh." Lucy went on. "I gotta go. If you wouldn't mind driving me back to my place now?"

Sean nodded. "No time for a quickie then?" He teased, but he had a rather grave expression on his face.

She laughed reluctantly and he helped her into her denim jacket. "Yeah, no, sorry, no time for a quickie."

"Well, shucks."

They walked down to his truck in silence.

Sean seemed perfectly at ease with how his life was going currently, while Lucy was slowly dying inside.

He got the door of his truck for her, gently assisting her up into the cab.

On the drive home, he turned down the radio, glancing sidelong at her. "You know, you should go easier on Paula. She tries really hard, you know, but she ain't trying to replace your mom. She knows she can't, I think she just wants you to be her friend. You should consider cutting her some slack."

Lucy refused to so much as flick a glance his way. "You should consider minding your own damn business, Kallaghan." She told him stiffly.

He smiled to himself in exasperation, but he obediently shut the hell up for the rest of the drive to Sunrose Creek Ranch.

###

He pulled up in front of the porch and turned the engine off.

Before she could move to get out, he asked her softly, "So does this mean we're breaking up?"

She turned and looked back at him, her fingers on the door handle. "Were we ever really together?"

He took too long to answer and she gave him a very dark look indeed. "Right, that's what I thought." She said, and she slammed the door behind her when she jumped down.

He watched her storming away and he told himself it was for the best. Lucy was a distraction from his work; his work had to be his top priority.

He had also seen enough pregnant women, however, to wonder if that test she'd taken hadn't been altogether accurate.

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