my short story's

Hidden Magic

Once upon a time. Upon this very land there lived a powerful little girl. She was unaware of the power she held. But others were, and they were afraid of her so they cast here out of the village. She wondered why none of them liked and accepted her. She thought there was something wrong with herself and grew to hate herself. She wondered up into the mountains and soon became aware of her hidden power and realized they were relay just afraid of her. Her hate turned toward them instead. And soon after realized her power had no boundaries. she stayed up in the mountains for 5 years and trained tell she had complete control over it. Then returned to the village to seek revenge on tho's who cast her aside. She burnt the village to the ground and covered it in 10 feet of ice and left the village to suffer. She used her power and built a castle upon the suffering village. And she's lived in her elemental castle for thousands of years. She soon grew tired of the nabroing kingdoms declaring war on her especially since she knew she was immortal and could never die. And she grew tired of the corpse piling up around her. She grew sad, sad because her power wasn't just to control and create things. She could feel what the solders were feeling and that was fear, anger, hate, carriage and loyalty to there king! She was tired of it all and beguine growing weak. One day an army was attacking. She killed them off one by one until they were all dead. But she steel sensed ones emotions carriage, loyalty, happiness, acceptance and understanding. She searched the piles of corpse and found one solder left. He wanted to talk so she listened. And he listened to her too. She told him she was weakening and couldn't keep going. he told her everything was fine and that everything's OK. They entered her castle and he joined her side. a wile later she realized she loved him and felt that he loved her too. And then realized he doesn't live forever like her. As time passed she grew weaker and weaker and finely died. The loyal solder died along side her. The castle fell down and berried the corpse along with the army that was currently attacking. The kingdom's rejoiced for there greatest enime has fallen. Thousands of years later the castle was a mountain and everything was calm once again and her power is steel in the mountain berried deep deep in the rib-cage of her corpse that decays as long as she lived, steel lost to the elements

the end 

tell me what you think please!