After She Left (girlxgirl)

Twenty

"Life is the art of dying."

-Atticus

Breathe. Stay awake. Breathe. Stay awake. 

I kept switching between the reality and the reality I had created in my own mind. The soft whispers kept repeating themselves.

Breathe. Stay awake.

Was it someone else saying these things to me or was it my own mind? It didn't matter as it was so soothing and made me feel at ease. Finally. I felt at ease. 

Breathe. Please. Breathe. 

I'm sorry, I tried to say. It was easier not to. 

Eden's POV

Gun shots, impossible to cross security system, about a hundred guards and perhaps one or, in the worst case scenario, even all of us not being able to make it out. 

That was what we expected. 

What we didn't expect was for the building to be completely empty as we entered it through the entrance the explosion had just created. Still staying cautious, we made our way through the building, one thing always lingering - the scent of blood. Or was it the scent of dead people? All I know if that person or people weren't dead yet, they would be shortly.

As we moved further into the building the scent only grew stronger.  

"Now this is unexpectedly dead," Luke added to the silence quietly. 

Somehow the mention of 'dead' made me feel uncomfortable, as if something wasn't right.

Blake nodded: "let's split up, I'll take the basement."

"Wait," I stopped him, grabbing his wrist, "something's not right."

He looked at me, with a slightly concerned look in his eyes: "I know you're worried about her, but the sooner we split up, the sooner and higher the chances of finding her."

So I let go of his wrist, nodding approvingly even thought the bad feeling at the pit of my stomach never left. 

Not long after we split up, Blake taking the basement as he had wanted, me taking first floor and Luke going for the second. I made my way through the rooms one by one, passing by the stairs that led both to the second floor and the basement, and every time, unfortunately, there was nothing in them. The silence and emptiness somehow made me even more worried. 

As I made my way through the last room, something clicked in me, sending alarms through my body. There had to be a bomb, we were just sitting ducks waiting to get blown up. In a way it made perfect sense - no one being here, all the rooms being empty. I ran through the corridors, first racing upstairs to find Luke. 

"Luke," I shouted, "I think there's something up with this."

"I'm here," he shouted back from one of the back rooms. 

"Well get your ass over here then," I replied, walking towards the direction of his voice.

I had reached the room he was in within seconds, pushing his shoulder when I saw him.

"How hard is it to come my when when I ask you to?" I whisper shouted at him, "we could've blown up by now."

"Yeah, I don't think that's going to happen," he replied calmly staring behind my back. 

"What?" I asked, confused, turning around to see what he was on about. 

And there it was, on the wall behind me. The dark red sentence written on the wall read: "I've done my job, now it's her turn". 

Before I could even open my mouth, Luke took off in the direction of the stairs. I had no choice but to chase after, shouting: "what the hell is going on?".

"Blake!" he ignored me, running down the stairs, "where are you?"

As we got closer to the basement, the smell of blood grew stronger and my running became walking. Against the walls of the basement rested a couple of blood covered mattresses, fresh blood still creating a trail of blood from a few of them. I couldn't help but wince at the smell and sight of this. There was an obvious room these mattresses had come for, because of the trail of blood dragging them to the corridor left behind.

At one point, I don't know when, I just stopped and so did Luke as he was about to enter the room. He stumbled a few steps back once he'd seen what had been in the room.

I couldn't help but think it. She was dead. Just a few steps and I'd see her dead body. And I just couldn't. I shut down, turning around and grabbing my head in my arms. What had I done?

She was dead because I was too much of a coward. She was dead, because I hadn't done my job. She was dead, because I chose my family over her. She was dead, because I expected her to understand. She was dead, because I hadn't come sooner. She was dead, because I let this happen. She was dead, because I got involved into her life. She was dead, because I loved her. 

She was dead because of me.

How do I tell her parents? What do I do with my life now? How do I get over this? How will I ever forgive myself? How could I be such a damn fool?

"Step back," I heard his voice behind me.

I turned around, seeing Luke and Andre in the doorway of that room.

"Step the hell back!" Andre raised his voice. 

So many emotions ran through my body, anger being the strongest one of them. And as I took the steps forward, getting the gun in my arms ready, with one reason only - killing him, my whole world fell apart in a second. 

In the second in which Andre turned to face me, his full body now in my view. His blood covered, shirtless upper body being too obvious to miss, the beaten face too, and then the person he'd been holding in his arms and how their arms were so limp they fell to the side and the slits across their veins, blood dripping down their fingers. How their entire, naked body, including the shirt covering them ever so slightly, was completely covered in blood. 

"Now is not the time to play 'who's got a bigger dick, gentlement',"  Hanna growled, pushing Luke away, "time to leave this shithole."

She turned only to see me a couple of steps in front of her, I couldn't help but notice the outfit from before, and her arms were covered by blood too. 

I opened my mouth to say something, perhaps ask what I was scared to know the answer to, but she beat me to it: "don't."

That was enough to shut me up. I stepped to the side, feeling as hopeless as one ever could, allowing them to leave the house, with all of us getting in the same car and speeding into the unknown. 

A/N - sorry for the wait and for this being way shorter than usually, but I'll try to get back to the weekly updates as yo girl finally got her laptop back!!! I know, let's all take a shot or two, or, hell, maybe even the whole bottle to that!