Loving and Losing Juliett

Chapter 2 : Loving You

"You want me to come with you?"

"Yes" I say.

"You want me to run away with you."

"Yes"

"I can't believe it, You really have lost your mind."

I smile, not telling her that I lost my mind the moment I saw her. I can tell be the way she hasn't kicked me out nor has she answered....she actually joked with me...that if not for Kent then she probably would have been the one asking me to run away... "Where's your face? I feel like I'm talking to a ghost."

"I'm right here."

"Where?"

I hear her moving. "I'm here."

"I still can't see you," I say as I lean towards her voice feeling heat pour of her. "Can you see me?"

"No" she lies. I can tell she sees me by the spike in her emotions.

She takes a step back and I reach out and grab her, feeling as if I might shatter if I don't.

I run my fingers over her soft skin, revealing in the intimate touch. The flimsy material barely covers anything and for that I am grateful. My heart kicks into overdrive with the realization that she hasn't pushed me away.

I push a little further.

"Is it even possible," I whispers, "that you can't feel this fire between us?" my hands lightly travel up the path of her and under the straps of her shirt and I feel as tho I might fracture if I don't touch her more - feel her more.

I allow my lips to softly run themselves over her shoulder in the ghost of a kiss and I feel her hold her breath, awaiting my next move.

I kiss her collar bone with more pressure than before but still barely any of the contract my heart, my mind, my body, my lips crave for.

As I force myself to pulls back, I touch her bottom lip, tracing the shape of her mouth, her lips part as though on their own accord and I steps closer. She must not even realize she's leaning into me, inhaling deeply into my neck. I remove my fingers from her lips only to place my hands around her waist.

Pressing closely I whisper "You," slowly - hoarsely. Then I hesitates. Finally I finish, saying if possible, softer "You destroy me"

She leans into my arms.

"Juliette," I says, slowly, savoring each letter. "I want you." And oh, I do. So bad it hurts. So bad. So far deep, into the things I never realized I had - my heart and soul. "I want all of you. I want you inside and out and catching your breath and aching for me like I ache for you. It's never been a secret. I've never tried to hide that from you. I've never pretended I wanted anything less." and that is true.

But I never have so blatantly put it all out there - my feeling for her. I loved with the false belief - the false hope that if I never said it with anything other than with actions... than I was never truly rejected - something I become accustomed to throughout my life. That if it was never voiced than she wouldn't be able to turn me down - to break my heart.

How wrong I was - I know that. I was being a coward, but truly I am nothing more than that inside.

"You-you said you wanted f-friendship-" she stutters, referring to one of the best days of my life...the day she says she didn't hate me, the day she unknowingly started to ignite my hope in an us... in the future.

"Yes," I swallows. "I did. I do. I do want to be your friend. I want to be the friend you fall hopelessly in love with. The one you take into your arms and into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be that kind of friend. The one who will memorize the things you say as well as the shape of your lips when you say them. I want to know every curve, every freckle, every shiver of your body, Juliette-" I say the last word as a moan.