Who am I?
I don't know... I'm still searching man. One time I'm a shy mute stiff guy, the other time I'm a big jock prankster, or a smartass lazy sarcaster, or a crazy outgoing drama dancer, or worse I'd be lifeless for a whole day.
I didn't know who I am. I won't know who I really am. Who I really was. The one who had adrenaline rush just over a new book. The one who wants to learn, not forced to learn because you gotta work in the future.
The one who genuinely smiles to people without wanting anything in return. The one who played because they want to, not because they're stressed and want a time out.
I can feel that I'm faking my life even more, yet my real self is screaming its way out. My real self crying of seeing me turning into another person.
Not a better one. An average, society shaped one. I wanna be true to myself and others but I'm afraid that they won't forgive my plastic past. I lied tons of times. Lost count. And people said that I'm a terrible liar. I wish I am. And I want to confess to them.
Every single one that trusted me. I know I'm wrong. And I want to fix that. I want to search for help, one who understands. I want to be good. I really do. But the good in me is fading away from the surface of my conscienciousness.
It's nearly gone. I'm running out of time. The evil has consumed me. Please, how can I come back? To the real world? Where I could be me, without being annoying every single time? Can you help me?
