the girl called mystery

• 10 •

"Myst- I mean, Estelle, where are we gonna go?" Colin asks from behind me.

I gulp, "Shh!"

"What are you shushing me for?" Colin walks to my side. He looks up and murmurs, "Oh shit."

"Hi, Daddy," I smile.

My father looks down at me. He looks the same as I remember him to be. He has grey in his hair and beard. He once stood tall, but now he slouches quite a bit. I can tell he's lost a lot of weight. Maybe he hasn't been eating much anymore.

"Estelle, is that really you? After all these years I can't believe it. You look just like your mother." He walks closer for a hug but I step away.

"Come on and give me a hug," he extends his arms out.

I push his arms away, "No!"
At first he looks hurt. Then, his face changes to a look of aggravation.

"Persistent. Just like your Momma was."
The look on his face bothered me. I didn't even want to know what he was referring to.

"You killed her didn't you?" I choked up. After all this time that was the only explanation I could come up with. My mom wouldn't abandon me. She loved me.

My father chuckled, "You're coming on pretty strong, don't you think? Of course I didn't. You think I'd ever do such a thing? She did it herself."

"She, she killed herself? Why would she do that?"

"The hell if I know. That woman was a piece of work," he continued laughing.

"Don't talk about her like that! What's wrong with you? You used to love her. What happened?"

"I don't care about that bitch anymore. She's dead and gone. Estelle, you need to move on. I have, and I've found a new light in my life."

"I'm gonna just go now," Colin piped in. I continue to forget that he's here with me.

My father turns to Colin, confused, "And who the fuck are you?"

"Oh, I'm Colin. Nice to meet you sir," he extends his hand.

I swat his hand away, "Don't."

I cut him an intense side-eye. Colin looks back at me.

"This your little boyfriend or something? Huh, Estelle? You got yourself a little white boy. Think you're too good for us black men don't you, Estelle?"

I felt my head get hot, "Are you fucking serious? What are you on? Have you been out drinking or something?"

He pulled a switchblade out of his pocket and lifted it to my face. My eyes got wide.

"Little girl. Don't you ever talk to your father that way. You deserve to get cut for all this fuckery you've been saying to me."
The blade gets closer to my face. I feel it dig into my right cheek.
A smug look appears on my father's face, "The wife is out, so I've gotta find some way to pass the time." He let's a small chuckle escape his lips.

It hurts like hell, but I'll be alright. I sense the blood escaping from the cut. What I'm most concerned about is that my dad has seemingly gotten remarried. I wonder what woman is crazy enough to marry this man. Oh, yeah...

"Aye man! What the hell is that for? Who the fuck cuts their own daughter in the face?" Colin gets in my father's face.

"Oh so you want some too?" My father slices an identical cut on Colin's right cheek.

"You two are gonna follow me. If you follow my instructions no one is gonna get hurt. Do I make myself clear?"

Colin and I nod.

It seems I've forgotten how this man is an absolute nightmare when he's drunk.