Quinoa

I never experienced this before. This feeling of helplessness and vulnerability. Maybe it was from the break-up or maybe it was from my own self-pity. My mind swelled with emotion as my heart tightened. Then finally, the door opened and I knew who it was. The cause of my pain, the bearer of my suffering, and the love of my life. It was the bitch from apartment 3b.

This chick who thought they can steal my quinoa from the fridge. How dare she, I mean I took her in when she was broke and she did this. I knew from the moment I saw her and her trashy Ross heels that she was nothing but trouble. But, I did have to admit she looked fierce in her head-to-toe silk gown. Maybe it was the way she smiled, and the way her eyes crinkled when she laughed, maybe it was the fine wine that brought us together.

I could remember it like it was yesterday - it was at the party at Barbra Streisand's house. Pumped Up Kicks was playing in the background as she drew closer to me, a glass of Chardonnay on one hand and a piece of pepper jack cheese on the other. But, nostalgia couldn't help with my emotions - listening to sad music as the rain hits the windshield.

We had the world on our fingertips, everything we could have wanted we had in each other. But, it wasn't just the quinoa that I had to leave but, it was myself - I can't live with myself after what I did. We had a beautiful love, the kind that secrets couldn't break; but apparently sooner or later bottled up emotions could burst, and it was time that ours had broken. My sad thoughts were cut short when a honk from behind interrupted me.

I stare back at the car from my rear view mirror, some angry girl threw me the finger, I huffed and returned the gesture. The better part of thought to reverse and ram into them and I did. Was that too reckless? Yes, yes it was. But the girl had it coming - how dare she drive the same car my ex had. That same navy blue Subaru, this chick had the nerve to remind me of the girl that broke my heart.

"Has your mind gone out the window?" The driver yelled.

I scoffed at her attempt of sarcasm, "Me? What about you? What you did was rude and uncouth, where is your class lady?"

"M'lady darling, M'lady - have some respect!" she said while pulling out tequila from the glove box. She downs half of the newly opened bottle and offers me the rest.

Letting out a sigh, I couldn't afford the insurance because of my fabulous dinner party the other night. "How about we find a way so I can repay these damages." I gave a wink.

She raised an eyebrow and let out a hearty laugh, "You have some guts, denting my Subaru and offering yourself like this."

"I wouldn't say I was offering myself but, you can't ride home like this and I have an empty seat - let me tow it and I'll let you stay with me till we can repair it." I said using my best charms.

She sighed and downed the rest of the tequila, "Sure, why not, A free ride is fine by me, just don't murder me or anything alright, my life is in your hands."

It was late at night as I walked through my loft in the hamptons gazing at the night sky while the stranger crashed in the guest room. What was I thinking bringing a complete stranger into my expensive home, I mean this place cost me $55,000 rent a month. Suddenly, the stranger brazenly walked into the room offering me another glass of red wine with her and a concerned look on her face.

"Hey now, what's with the long face? If it's about the car, don't worry, it was my brothers." She smiled.

"It's actually the reason why. I hit your car because it reminded me of my ex. But, don't worry the bitch took my quinoa." I said trying my best not to reveal anymore information.

The girl stared at the glass of wine, swirling it around. "So you're all messed up about quinoa?"

"It's not as stupid as you might think I swear. But, she - I did something and it had to do with quinoa." I said trying to return to star gazing. I could tell she wanted to ask about what that something was but she didn't make a sound, instead she offered me the wine once more. "We met at a party fighting over the last quinoa, soon enough we were in a relationship but, I was often known to stray and so was she apparently. But, the quinoa - the quinoa wasn't the food anymore. It was our codename for whenever we had a fight but, we got back together. The bitch took the quinoa away from me." I said to the confused girl.

Her face contorted to great confusion and then to frustration at trying to understand at what I had just said, "I'm sorry, but what does that mean? What does any of the things you just said mean? Quinoa? What?"

"I knew you wouldn't understand. It was our thing. Quinoa was the symbol that brought us together and now she took it away from us." I said tear broken and running to the wine cellar.

As I cried with empty bottles of Chardonnay surrounding me, I hear footsteps nearing me. The girl sat down next to me and hesitantly offered a comforting pat on my back, "Look man, whatever you had with your ex, this Quinoa, it's all over now, and I think it's best if you just move on."

"But I want my quinoa." I said sobbing on her shoulder.

She rubbed my shoulder, comforting me as I sob hideously. Her soft whispering calming me down, "I know you want quinoa, and you're probably craving it, but here is a suggestion: Have you ever tried Hummus?"

The End.