Three couples went to a resturant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table.
"Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal.
"Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second.
"Could you pass me the bacon, pig?" said the third
The 20 Disses
Words can't describe your outfit, so I'll just throw up! They can't measure your intelligence. The scale won't go that low. Appearances can be deceiving. Or in your case, disgusting. I promise not to make fun of your height. I would never stoop to that. I'm glad you're tall. It gives me more of you to dislike. I think you stepped on something smelly. Like your feet! I've seen tables with nicer looking legs than yours. Are you going to eat that apple, or gum it to death? Your mouth's the perfect size... for your foot. I've seen a nose like yours before, but it looked better on the baboon. Know what I like about your face? Me neither. Know what goes best with a face like yours? A paper bag. Why don't you do something different with your hair? Like, wash it. You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any. You'll never use your mind. You can't lose what you never had. You've made this date I won't forget... no matter how hard I try. I know why they call this a "blind date." Because now that I've seen you, I wish I were blind. You're like disposable diapers...always getting dumped. ''What are you doing Friday night?'' ''Trying to forget you just asked me that.'' "What's he got that I haven't?" "You want it alphabetically?"
Q: What do you call a fat psychic? A: A four chin teller. Q: What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A: A Dell Rolling in the Deep. Q: What did Bacon say to Tomato? A: Lettuce get together! Q: What do you call a computer that sings? A: A-Dell Q: Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica? A: It's dread-full. Q: How do you make a tissue dance? A: Put a little boogey in it! Q: What do you call a gangsta snowman? A: Froze-T
At The End Of The Cave
Three men walk into a cave, and hear a voice from the back.
"I'm coming to get you! And I'm going to eat you!"
The first man runs away.
They hear the voice again.
"I'm getting closer! And I'm going to eat you!"
The second man runs away.
The voice comes once more.
"I've nearly got you! And I'm going to eat you!"
The last man bravely walks on.
And at the very back of the cave, he finds a small boy picking his nose.
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
wife: I saw in my dream that you baought me a dimond ring!!
husband: And i saw a dream that your dad paying the bill!!
HEY GUYS!! THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR READING MY BOOK! AS YOU KNOW I HAVE WRRITTEN A NEW BOOK CALLED FORSE! WELL ANYWAY I WILL UPDATE MORE PROMISE!!
