Love Simon Contest

Dear World

Dear World, 

This is the real me. You might not know me but I'm done being quiet, I'm done not speaking up. You just expect me to do my work and not even say a thing. I should have been fine, I was having food in my stomach every day I had clothes and  had a roof over my head. But as I got older there was people saying that other people were fat. These were people that were skinner than me. I wanted to ask them, am I fat? People would always no you're not fat, you're pretty, beautiful, you shouldn't be changing who you are. People started to lie to me, they took secrets that they knew would hurt me and kept it to themselves, they don't even bother giving me the truth. So I didn't even bother asking them anymore. I started to not eat breakfast, I started not eating lunch at school, and people would ask me why I wasn't eating. I always replied with, "I'm not hungry." In reality  I was starving. I drank water feeling the coolness trying to fill my body so I can get through the day and eat at dinner. This went in for about 2-3 years and still happening to this day. I never thought I was perfect from that moment on, I lived as a coward a mindless person wandering in their own shell. After 13 long damn years I'm done being quiet. I want to be loud and proud without people judging me. Every day after I felt like my life was a tower one bad mistake and it would fall down. 

I then thought that I shouldn't live the life I'm living right now, that I could do better, so I started to cut thinking that if I do then I would be able to live in a better place. Things got worse, people kept more secrets, they talked behind my back. I thought that I was able to live the life I want, if I cut. For years I thought that I was a mistake, that I was a disappointment. Then something changed, my world was still upside down, but it's slowly turning back up. My grandmother had diabetes, she had it for years even before I was born. So during her last few years of her life she had to go to the hospital constantly. Later, on August 24th, 2016... she had a heart attack and wasn't able to make it, she was already at the hospital but I wasn't there for her final moments. I was trying to keep up with better chores, eat more, and continue my studies because I know that is something that she would've have wanted.

 I was still constantly teased about my weight not even eating until I get home from school. It sucks knowing you should have ate, because you're tired and you crying all the time. Thanks for listening. This is me and my story. 

                                                                 Love,

                                                               EmilyClemente4