It was humid.
And the wind didn't help. usually wind takes away from the horrendous feeling of being smothered by damp heat, but this wind only moved it around.It was as if we were in a hot tub in the Summer, and the wind represented the jets, circulating the water but not changing the temperature in the slightest.
I didn't care, though. Luke was holding my hand and the moon contoured his face perfectly. The shadows in his cheeks didn't look sickly, they looked beautiful. The frailer Luke became, the harder it was to find any trace of his original self, but this lighting made Luke look like the elegant 14 year old I fell in love with in year ten.
"Mikey, we're here," he said, pullng my gaze in front of us. The Hollywood Sign towered above us on a hill, it's lights casting patterns and shadows on the white letters. Luke looked up at the steep hill and whimpered. "I don't know if I can make it up there," he said weakly. I smiled at him and traced little hearts on his palm. "I'll carry you," I said, determined, "you're going to see it up close." He grinned so wide I thought his lips might rip open. I picked him up, and proceeded to carry him bridal style up the hill. He pulled into my chest and held tight. I don't know why he was scared, he was so light, dropping him seemed impossible.
It took about ten minutes to get up there, seeing as it was a very steep hill. I sat him down in front of the "H" and I crawled over beside him. He leaned over and kissed my cheek and I smiled. Luke frowned slightly. "I guess you want to know why we came here," he said softly, scooting in closer to me. I nodded and he cleared his throat. "I love you Michael, so much. More than I could ever love anyone. You take care of me and you never backed away from me even when we found out that I was dying," I swallowed, he used the d word, "I know that when I die, you're going to be sad. And that's okay, grieving is normal. But don't ever let the sadness get a hold of you. You're strong Mikey, stronger than anyone I've ever met. I don't ever want you to think that when I finally let go of this life I'm living that there's nothing left," he paused, and a tear rolled down my cheek,
"There's never nothing left."
I kissed him. I kissed him harder than I ever had before. I held on for dear life and I kissed him. I only broke away to whisper little "I love you"'s into his mouth. When I pulled away my teary green eyes were met with a piercing blue. "Thank you for taking me here Mikey, it's so beautiful," he said slowly. He looked sick now, his eyes struggling to stay open.
And then he collapsed.
I dialled 911 as fast as I could. "Hello? Yes this is Michael Clifford. I'm at the Hollywood sign with my boyfriend. His name is Luke Hemmings and he has osteosarcoma. He just collapsed and I don't think he's breathing. Please! Help!" They said they would be there in five minutes and to wait for an ambulance to arrive. I pulled Luke's limp body into my lap and I sobbed. I shook his body and nothing happened. "Why won't you wake up?" I screamed, "Wake up, Luke! Please! Please..." I leaned down and sobbed into his chest.
"But what if there is nothing left, Luke? What then?"
