Resurrection (Harry Styles Fan fiction)

5

One month. One damn month has gone by since I lost the love of my life. The minutes that go by feel like hours, the hours feel like days, and the days feel like weeks. I still haven't left by bed. If I do, it's to go to the bathroom. I don't remember when the last time i've eaten was. I do remember one time when I got up to go to the bathroom, I weighed myself on the scale and I was 10 pounds lighter than I usually am.

None of this seems real. I feel like Rachael is going to walk through the front door with her usual smile on her face and two cups of coffee that she brought us so we could sit on the patio and watch the sun go down together.

My phone has not stopped ringing since "that day", but I am too mentally exhausted to move to pick it up. I am guessing it's my Boss, or perhaps my parents. Many times I will be woken up by knocks on the door. Again, either
my boss or my parents. A life without Rachael is not a life at all. I am barley even existing. I don't want to exist if Rachael can't be here to exist with me.

I look over at the dresser. The ring is still placed on the pile of her clothes I pulled out. I've noticed that day by day the diamond becomes less and less bright. I guess that when love isn't felt after a certain amount of time, things in ones eyes don't shine as bright.

Words cannot describe my emptiness. To know that I will never hear her voice or feel her soft hands touch mine again, makes this feeling worse. Never again will I get to wrap my hands around her waist and run my hands through her hair.

She is not coming back, is what I keep telling myself. Driving myself crazy with those words day after day. She is NOT coming back. She's gone. She isn't across town or across the country, she is nowhere. She had so much to live for. She is the last person on this planet who deserved to die. She always donated to charities and helped out at the homeless center in the city. I don't understand why she had to be the one to go.

"God Dammit!" I scream in anger and connect my fist with my nightstand. Leaving a broken piece of wood and my tear stained shirts to lay on the floor.

I put my feet to the floor for the first time in a month, and walk into the kitchen. The whole house is exactly like it was the day she walked out the door to leave for work. Her shoes are set on the mat near the door. Her jacket is hung on a chair. The glass she drank her coffee from that morning is still on the counter. Her lip stick stain is around the rim.

I grab a cup from the counter and fill it with ice water. I then grab the box of leftover pizza from a month ago from the refrigerator and walk over to the couch and sit down. Just as I sit down, the doorbell rings.

"Fuckin lovely" I whisper to myself. I walk to the door and whip open the door. In front of me, stands a tall man who looks to be in his 50's.

"What the hell do you want?!" I spit at him. He blinks hard before reaching his hand out to me.

"I'm Rachael's father" the man explains, making me nearly collapse onto the floor.

---

I don't know what to say. I just stand there staring at the old man who I now know as my dead girl friends father who she never mentioned.

"May I come in?" He asks. I step away from the door, gesturing him in. I lead him into the living room and he sits down.

"Can I help you?" I ask.

"I think we need talk" The man replies.

"I think you should tell me you're name" I demand.

"I'm John, Rachael's biological father" He explains. "I'm here to tell you what happened the day Rachael died".

"I don't want to hear it" I scold at him. I begin to stand up and leave the room but he insists I listen.

I sit back down and look him in the eyes.

"I've been watching you and Rachael now for a while. I am Rachael's biological father, and I got out of jail just a little while ago. When I did, I made it my mission to find her and make sure she's ok" he says. I'm confused and angry at the same time. Confused as to why he was hiding from us, and angry because he's been spying on us. Who the hell does that?

"I've been keeping myself out of sight because I wasn't sure if Rachael even wanted me back... I thought she believed that I killed her mom, also known as my wife" He explains.

"I know you didn't kill Rachael's
Mom" I say. "Rachael didn't think you did either" I add.

"I know, I talked to her" he says quickly. He what?

"What the hell? When?" I asked sternly. I am about to set this damn room on fire if I don't get more answers. Soon.

"The day she died. I saw her at the grocery store and tried to run away but she noticed me. I gave her a note that her mom wrote her back when she was young, and her mom was sick with cancer... I think the note brought back memories and thoughts that overwhelmed her. I think that..." He says but stops mid sentence.

"You think what?" I ask annoyed. He swallows, and then says what I never expected.

"I think she may have killed herself"

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