Anaesthetic

Anaesthetic - Oh how I do not feel you!

A.N - Please please please Comment they will be greatly appreciated! and Vote if you like!!! I have re written this chapter to 1st person. changing all the other chaps later on.

 

               1. Oh how I do not feel you

Sense nothing but the pressure on the surface. It’s all superficial. Feel nothing deep. Try to feel anything other than superficial pressure. Cutting ones self only releases blood, pain is temporary. Squeezing ice cubes hurts like a bitch, down side, wet hands are annoying. Elastic band on the wrist, the sound is irritating, causes adverse effects. Pulling ones own hair, temporary, until you pull it out.

 

Amy

18

Brunette, Average looks, Athletic.

 

4:45AM - (Alarm) Long draw of breath in through nose. ‘’ogh!!’’

4:50AM – (Alarm) Rolls over... “MMph!”

4:55am – (Alarm) Rolls on back and stares at ceiling. “Humph.”

5:00AM –(Alarm) Blinks and folds quilt over on it’s self to the bottom of bed.

 

I walk into my bathroom where my bathroom necessities are already laid out, prepared, ready for me. Shower and brush teeth.

Slap .... Slap .... Slap ... Slap...

I love that sound; so rhythmic, so clear cut, so pure, so medicinal. Running is my lover. Running doesn’t mean breaking away from the stresses of my life or even problems fabricated in my own mind. It could just mean life. Pure bliss, that is my lovers affection. I love the pain in my chest from sprinting a few seconds, the feel of my heart speeding up to the ache of it slowing down. It’ pure, undiluted self harm.

When running I don’t think, instincts kick in. Reality slips away from me, feeling the wind caressing my exposed shoulders and shins to the beautiful ache in my chest. I look to the sky...

“Ough!” Bewildered and winded, “ouch, you’re on my...”

“Shut your Fucking face!” He forcefully whispered on my neck. I can feel his saliva fly from his clenched teeth and land on my neck. I feel it go cold from the morning air. All I want to do is scratch it off my neck but I restrain myself.  I say nothing. I can see nothing. My eyes won’t let me. All I can see is a memory of being back in high school and Ross, one of the boys from my year, had flown into my back accidently while playing rugby with the some others. I laughed when I was on the floor.

Snapping back to reality, something sharp made its cold, hard way across my stomach. ‘That’s not what happened with Ross... He never touched my stomach.’

“You crazy BITCH,” He spat. “Shut your FUCKING FACE!! NOW!!” he whisper screamed in my ear. I see myself being walked along by this ‘man’ on my left side. He had his arm around my back holding on to my right arm. He gripped my skin of my arm so tight it will leave a few bruises almost immediately.

‘He’s gripping my arm a little tighter than necessary. Ogh that flipping hurts. Bit rude init! Little snot.’

I realised I was laughing just like I was laughing at Ross running in to me. ‘Oh that’s why he snapped at me.”

“OW!” It escaped my lips before I had the chance to rein it in. I look around myself on the floor as he crouched in front of me.

“you WILL shut your pretty little face, SLAG! You WILL do everything I tell you because BABY...” He stroked my face with the back of his hand. He looks down my body. “I REALLY want to enjoy this one.” He says through his saliva covered lips.