No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
Second option, thats what I am. She ruined everything. She ruined everything. Why did she have to come along? Why did she have to come and mess everything up? Why did she come between us? Why? Why would you choose her over me? Was I that bad? Boring? Or was I too ugly? Yep thats it... Ugly.
Same time every night, 2:56am. Every night. Evey single night, I wake up to the same nightmares. As I lay on my bed, curled up in a ball, tightly gripping one of his shirts that amazingly still smells so gorgeously good. I thought hard, I thought about everything and anything.
-Flashback-
"Sonny, I-I err" he opens his mouth but shuts it straight after. He cleared his throat. "Listen Sonny, we cant be friends anymore"
Thats when I felt the while world stop right there. My head was pounding. My palms were sweating. All of a sudden it was hard for me to breath. 18 years of friendship? 18 years of friendship he's going to throw away like its the easiest thing? What did I do?
"W-w-what?" I cried in between quite sobs. Trying to gulp down the lump slowely forming on my throat. The tears glazing over my eyes making my vision blury, right now im not even bothered to wipe them away.
"Listen, She thinks theres something going on-"
"There isnt" I whispered quitly.
"-She thinks that im cheating on her with you. She thinks that apparently you look at me in a different way and the most shocking so do I! Like what? You're my bestfriend-"
"Was" I corrected for him.
He stared at me blankly. Startled that the word even left my mouth.
" I hate you" I muttered through gritted teeth. He gaped his mouth open. Theres SO much I want to say right now. So many lies I've been hiding from him.
"You-" I pointed to him. "-are a dick. 18 years of friendship, Logan. 18 fucking years of godamn friendship. Did them 18 years mean nothing to you what so ever? Huh? Or was it some sick joke of yours?"
"N-no, Sonny. I-Its not like that-"
"Shutup" This is what he wants, right? So lets give him what he is wants.
"You dont want to be friends anymore right? Well guess what lerman, I-" Pointing to myself "-am Never ever going to speak to you again and you-" Pointing to him "- beter never ever let my name come out of your mouth"
I couldnt take it any longer, I took a step back.
He took a step forward. "Sonny, dont do this"
Another.
"Sonny please"
and another.
"Sonny" His voice cracked.
"I said I dont want my name rolling off of your tongue" I spat, looking at him in disgust. By now I had reached Justins door, I turned around, opened the door and took a few steps up the drive way before turning around one more time.
"Goodbye Lerman" I spat once again, before running up the porch into my car, and speeding away.
-End of flashback-
I remember that day like it was just yesterday. The way I cried, I had never ever cried so much.
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taaa daaaaaaaaaaaa
