Wanderer

4 - Dark Night of the Mind

Alaytar

The world is devoid of light and the night is without stars.

 The room is almost completely dark except for the smouldering shadows of the embers in the fireplace and comfortably warm.

I can’t sleep, but I don’t worry because I never can. Dark nights for dark thoughts. A master of dark thoughts by dark thoughts mastered. This is when I forget the light.

The Dark One must never get the Silmaril. A world like this night would be left, without light or stars. I will not let this happen to Eä.

Jade rolls over in her sleep, calling out a name. Elrond. Is she reliving the kiss in her dreams that Elrond gave her tonight, the one she shyly confided to me? I know she will dream of it many times before the next one. I remember the feeling, waking up from a good dream with heightened senses and a burn branded across my heart.

Kassandra, I hope you know that I miss that fire now. I could easily rekindle it, but moral means or not, but I miss you, not your fire. I could look into your eyes and see the stars mirrored there and watch it burn. I miss you every day; every time I look at Jade I see you. She is so precious to me, because she is all I have left of you. Does she know she is able to kindle that same fire and has already, in the heart of a boy with eyes dark as a starless night?

 I first kissed Kassandra in a darkened room much like this one, on a starless night. Sometimes I still kiss her in my dreams, and I wake up ensconced in a glow, my lips searing hot, and my fingers remember the feel of the ivory skin of her face. A world without light. My world is a night without stars and no hope of dawn.

What the night hides! Passion and fear burst to existence, love and hate unite under the same darkness. They each become so strong under the night’s cloak that they become one, just different sides of the same coin. A toss of fate and the night holds fear. Flip the coin again, and the night is slick with passion and sweat.

I know what side of the coin I am living. Master of darkness by the darkness mastered. Slowly, the dark night wears on.