The Trouble With Love (SHOEY Fanfic) DISCONTINUED

Building up (Chapter 17)

I felt soft fingertips tracing my abs and I shivered. He was magical, he knew exactly what drove me crazy.

His hot breath was on my neck, and he was whispering sweet nothings to me.

He loves me... I love him... It was perfect.

I slowly kissed him, letting my tongue slip into his mouth. He moaned softly into my mouth, which made me want to kiss him more.

I ran my fingers through his hair and gently tugged when he bit my lip.

It was Shane.

He moved my hands from his neck to his waist. I felt his hands move from there, trailing under my shirt. He looked at me, his eyes filled with love, adoration, and peace. When I looked into his eyes he smiled.

"I love you, husband."

My eyes shot open, and I realized that I must've dozed off after texting Shane. I sighed and sat up on my bed. My dreams are always so much better than reality...

And I seem to have morning- I glanced at my clock, -evening wood.

Just great.

I had walked out of my room after tending to my problem.

Sawyer was up now, still somewhat hungover, but well enough to move around.

"Morning, Joey..." He walked past me rubbing his face. He had some pretty serious bed hair, and his overall appearance looked like he got hit by a bus. He needs to start going easier on the vodka...

"Uh, Sawyer? It's 4:00pm..."

"Whatever the fuck, I don't give a shit about the damn time." He glared daggers at me and clenched his jaw.

Well, this is new.. I've never seen him this pissy. Especially to me.

I sat on the stool by the counter and let my thoughts roam. They instantly went to my dream, and I quickly pushed it away.. I need to slow down.

If i take things too fast then I'll scare Shane off. First things first, I have to subtly flirt with him... Be gentle and give him cute looks...

I tried to remember every trick I had observed other people using to get the girl or guy. I of course, never used them because I hadn't seen anyone I truly wanted before I saw Shane.

I can't even control it. I want him. I need him. Nothing I tell myself can convince me otherwise. Any little thing he does attracts me to him even more.

I will get him. Between my charm and persuasion, it shouldn't be very hard to convince him to be my boyfriend. Not to be prideful or anything, but who wouldn't want me?

Sawyer trudged back into the room and shoved me off the stool, pushing me against the wall.

I gasped at the sudden force against my chest and back. His hands were gripping my collar, and his elbows dug into my chest. I scanned the room for Izzy, but she was nowhere to be seen.

"Look, Joey. If you keep fucking with Shane, it's going to tear Izzy apart. He fucking abused her, in every possible way. I wouldn't be surprised if he raped her!"

My heart was racing and my palms were sweating. I know just how strong Sawyer is, and with one swing he could knock me out...

"He would ne-"

"CUT THE BULLSHIT, JOEY!" He was screaming to my face, and I started shuddering against the wall in fear.

"He will ALWAYS be an abuser, he will ALWAYS play people, he will always FUCK PEOPLE UP!"

Tears came to my eyes at that. Shane is perfection, even if he made a few mistakes... I can't leave him... He has no one... Well, no one but Lisa and his mom.

I want to be his, and have him as mine... Mine alone.

Sawyer noticed my tears and clenched his fists tighter, digging into my neck.

"You're so fucking NAÏVE, Joey!" He shoved me harder into the wall and I grunted. The pressure against my collarbone was beginning to be too much...

"Why can't you see that as soon as you two get together he will abuse YOU too?! You want to be beaten every damn day like Izabella?!"

I was almost choking at this point. He had his forearm pressed on my neck and somehow I managed to croak a few words.

"Don't... Give a... Fuck..."

That was a really bad move on my part.

His face reddened and he threw me to the floor. I barely had time to stumble before my body hit the floor. He stormed out of the room, into his room, slamming the door.

I could barely move... I just lay there, trembling in pain and terror at what Sawyer had done to me. It really made me think about his words. I mean, it does make sense, but no matter what I tell myself, I keep coming back to Shane.

I could barely feel my left side where I hit the floor most, and it was still tingling from the impact.

I slowly got to my feet, groaning, and stumbled to the couch. At that moment, Izzy walked in.

I was thankful that I had gotten off the floor and out of questioning before she came in. She would freak out if she knew what Sawyer had just done.

Izzy sat next to me, humming Collar Full. She rested her head on my throbbing shoulder, and I let out a bit of air as the pain shot through my arm.

She kept humming, not noticing my distress, and closed her eyes.

Izzy finished the song and we just say in silence. The stinging pain in my shoulder was slowly decreasing, so I relaxed more into her touch.

"Joey?"

"Hm?"

"Will you always love me, even when I have my baby?"

"Of course! How could I not?"

She opened her eyes and looked at me. I grinned slightly, causing her to press closer into my side, which sent new pain throughout my body. I tried not to flinch, but I still did slightly.

"Well... Babies aren't easy to take care of, and they're loud, smelly, and tiring. I don't want you and Sawyer to kick me out..." She looked at me again, her blue eyes flickering with doubt.

Her eyes reminded me so much of Shane's. They both had the same ice-blue, gentle gaze of a Dawson. I smiled and tried not to laugh at the silliness of her question.

That seems like a pretty stupid reason to force someone out of your house. I could never make her leave.

"Izzy! You know we both love you, I think Sawyer a bit more..." I wink and she blushes. "But we won't ever kick you out because of something stupid. I think I might actually love having a kid around..."

Izzy's smile widened and she hugged me.

"Thanks for everything, Joey."

It looks like things are lightening up... I'm actually happy again. No more tears, sadness, or pain.

Well, with the exception of my side that is in stinging agony from her hug.

But I didn't care at the moment. I finally have no worries.

Now all I need is Shane.