It was early on a wednesday and I ws driving over to Shane's to film a new video. I tried to vlog, but nothing would come out of my mouth. I just couldn't talk. The road seemed to get longer as I was driving, like I would never get there. I know we joke alot, but I kind of really like Shane. But, I could never tell him, he has Lisa. I couldn't ever tell anyone about it. besides, Shane is straight. I thought I was too, but ever sense I met Shane, I just don't know anymore. Whenever I see him, my hands get sweaty, i cant speak, my heart pounds out of my chest, and I feel nervous. I think I might be in love. But it could never work, he has Lisa, and I wouldn't want to mess that up. He has everything, his life is perfect, he is perfect, and I'm just a mess.
I finally got to Shane's and opened the door. When I opened it, I felt Shane's lips on mine, they were warm, and soft, and for a second, I thought it was real, but then I saw Lauren, holding a camera. I was hurt, but I pretended it was funny. Shane could never know. After filming the collabs, we sat there on the couch, side by side watching the videos, to make sure they were good. While Shane wasnt looking I snuck a peak at his sparkling hazel eyes. But soon turned back to the laptop screen. I had to talk to him.
After watching , we figured out what to edit out and then we just sat there. Side by side.
"Sh-sh-sh-shane" I said, instantly regretting it, hoping he hadn't heard me.
"Yea? What's wrong, Is there something I forgot to edit?" He said in a deep, sexy voice.
"No, No, nothing like that, I just need to talk to you." I said in a nervous, quiet voice.
"Sure, anything" Shane said back, his eyes staring into mine.
"Shane, I know we joke alot, but...but...I kind of really like you, and I know you have Lisa,I just...I.. I had to say something, I had to get it off of my chest."
"Oh my gosh, Joey, I wasn't expecting anything like that. I...I don't know what to say. I can't, I'm sorry, I have Lisa. I love Lisa."
"I know...I... I dont know why I even said anything...I...I...I have to go."
"No Joey wait! I want to talk to you!"
"Why?" I said helplessly with tears streaming down my face.
"Because, I sort of, kind of, feel the same way."
"What? No you don't! You have Lisa! You just think this is some joke! That my heart is broken! And you can just make this into some big joke! You think that makes it better! Becausee it doesn't Shane! It doesnt!!!"
"No! Joey! It's not like that! I promise! I promise! I would never do that to you, babe."
"Shane? Did you just call me babe?"
"Yea, I did. I have felt this for a while now, when I kissed yo today for Dare the Dawson, I felt sparks run through me, like when your middle school crush talks to you for the first time. Like we were meant to be together, Like nothing could ever seperate us. But...I have Lisa."
"Well, we could...nevermind."
"What? What were you going to say Joey?"
"Nothing, Nothing, it was stupid."
"What Joey?"
"We could always, keep it a secret, hide it from Lisa and th viewers. I know it's a stupid idea, I just really like you Shane, and I wish we could be together. But we cant you have everything in your life set perfect and I dont want to mess that up for you. And I just-"
I was interrupted by Shane's lips crashing into mine. They were warm. This felt right. I wanted this, all day, everyday. His lips on mine.
"Babe, lets keep us... a secret." He whipered sexily into my ear.
