Run (A Bucky Barnes Recovery Story)

46

The Winter Soldier was an excellent fighter. Time and time and time again, he dropped Natalia and pinned her to the ground, his hand to her neck, his face blank. Natalia stared up at him, a pounding beginning to drum in her head, rippling out from the very back of her skull where he had slammed her head into the ground. He pulled away after a second, climbing to his feet and Natalia began to pull herself up as well, until the Winter Soldier did something she didn’t expect. He’d never offered her a hand up before, but he did now, extending his right hand and looking her in the face. She looked back and forth from his eyes to his hand, suspicious, and decided not to take it. She pulled herself to her feet and the Winter Soldier took his hand back, frowning.

“Is that not normal?” he asked.

“Not for you,” Natalia said. “What did I do wrong that time?”

“You didn’t bring your leg back fast enough,” the Winter Soldier said. “If you move too slow, you’ll be grabbed.” Natalia frowned, thinking about this. Then, with no warning, Natalia swung her leg out again, high and fast and directly in line with the Winter Soldier’s head. His eyes grew wide and he just barely dodged. “Yes, like tha-” he started to say, but she kept going, slinging out a fist and getting him right in the jaw. The Winter Soldier stumbled back for a second, holding his face. Natalia stopped, pulling her arms back to her, and stared, afraid. The shadows about his face were too dark for her to tell what he was thinking. Was he angry? If he wanted to, she knew he could kill her. But when he looked up, he was smiling. There was a glimmer of something in his eyes for once, like a challenge, and he sprang forward, reaching for her wrists, but she pulled away and stuck out a leg and nearly tripped him, but he was prepared now and avoided her. They continued on like this, back and forth, back and forth, and she could tell he wasn’t going easy on her anymore, but they were both grinning widely and breathing heavily with the exertion and then, just for a second, his hand was on her shoulder and she grabbed it and twisted and he gasped as she held his arm behind his back and shoved him down. She was careful with his face as they both fell, making sure he didn’t hit himself too hard. She knelt over him, straddling his back, and released his arm. He pulled it back slowly, rolling his shoulder, and twisted his head to try to look at her.

“That was good,” he said, smiling, and she moved off of him as he rolled himself over until he was flat on his back.

“You went easy on me,” she accused teasingly, even though she knew he didn’t, kneeling next to his head and looking into his face, elated to have seen some sort of emotion there.

“I didn’t,” he replied truthfully. “I have before, but I didn’t then.” He raised his arms and folded them behind his head, looking at her. She stared at him, relaxing his head on a metal arm, and laughed.

“Is that even comfortable?” she asked and he scoffed.

“No,” he said, his smile getting a little wider.

“Then why do you do it?” she asked and he shrugged and pulled his arms back now, using them to push himself up to a sitting position directly across from her. He was taller than her and had to look down, even now when he was just sitting.

“Ready to go again?” he asked.

“Sure,” she said and he poised himself to stand again, then stopped and looked at her.

“If I try to help you up, are you just going to stare at me again or what?” He asked and she laughed.

“This time, I’m not even going to get up unless you help me,” she teased and he grinned, standing and when he offered her both hands this time, she took them and let him haul her to her feet.

Before Natalia left the Winter Soldier in the sparring room alone at the end of their lesson, she stopped and looked at him.

“I never got your name,” she said.

“I think they call me the Winter Soldier,” the Winter Soldier said and Natalia rolled her eyes.

“Some name,” she said. “Did your mom pick that out?” He frowned and shrugged.

“I don’t think I have an ordinary name,” he said.

“Everyone has one,” she said.

“Not me,” he said and Natalia frowned now, not teasing or prodding, just concerned.

“Where were you born?” she asked and the Winter Soldier stared at the ground. He was frowning again, deeply, and was silent for a long time.

“I dunno,” he said.

“How old are you?” she tried again, growing more and more afraid. The Winter Soldier shook his head slowly, swallowing.

“I dunno,” he whispered. She almost asked another question, but he kept talking. “I don’t know, I don’t know.” Natalia watched him begin to pace, his face afraid, one hand on the back of his head and the other on his waist. “I don’t know, I don’t, I-I,”

“Hey,” Natalia said, stopping him, and he looked up at her, his eyes watering. “Don’t worry about it, the not knowing, okay?” He swallowed and blinked and tried to breath. “Don’t worry about it, we’ll figure it out, okay?” He nodded slowly.

“Okay,” the Winter Soldier said quietly.