Wanderer

37 - Valinor

Earendil

"Earendil."

Alaytar appears in my cabin from the deck, his hair soaking wet. I'm surprised to see him; he's been more taciturn than usual since my outburst. He's deadly serious.

"I think you need to see this."

I look out the window onto the sea, sparkling blue and gold. No storm. Nothing appears to be imminently dangerous.

I rise, pushing aside the maps on my desk. I follow him outside into the blinding sunshine, which mocks me whenever I think of the storm that left me numb.

No. No. I can't think of that. 

Elwing. Oh Valar above, Elwing.

Through sheer force of habit, I straighten. I push her face away, leaving only the memory of it stinging in my  mind.

"What happened to you?" I comment on Alaytar's drenched appearance. 

He smiles. "That's just it. You haven't really looked, have you?"

For the first time, I take in the ocean around me. 

The first thing that registers is the warmth. Suddenly, my cloak seems stifling; the sea breeze warm and gently scented of...flowers? On the ocean? I ponder this phenomenon as the gentle wind plays with my hair.

Over the edge of the ship, I can see straight to the sandy bottom. The waters are a clear but oddly electric blue. 

Not two hundred meters away, there's land.

A huge golden expanse of sand greets me on the starboard side. The sand evolves into grass, and then the lushest forest I've ever laid eyes on. The beach and the forest stretch on as far as I can see in either direction.

"The Havens," I murmur, Elwing quite forgotten.

A sudden bolt of excitement wracks me. "Oh Alaytar, let's go!" I'm all for abandoning the ship on the spot. The gulls are calling me, the soft waves whispering my name. Alaytar opens his mouth - to protest, no doubt - when the Vingilote slides to a halt on the sandbar. 

How'd I miss this?

Alaytar takes up a rope and jumps overboard, splashing into knee-deep crystal water.

I follow, landing with a spray that sends the liquid into my mouth. It tastes like something I can't place but recognize nonetheless - a cross between rainwater, mountain streams, and a clear, potent something that's making me giddy and strong. I burst out laughing, and boldened by the water, douse Alaytar in a splash of seawater.

He turns, a frown on his lips, but when he sees me, it slowly evolves into a smile, and then he's laughing like I've never heard before. His white teeth flash, and he comes back to me, putting an arm around my shoulder. We wade through the shallows, onto the water-soft sand.

At the edge of the green forest, three lithe elves leap from the branches to the grass.

"Earendil." The tallest steps forward and takes my shoulders in greeting. "Long have we watched your journeys. Your coming here is known to us. Come. You are weary beyond telling. Eat, sleep, tarry with us. You will heal here."

I look straight into the elf's ageless, ink-black eyes, and suddenly, it's all I can do not to cry.

"Heal me."

The elf nods carefully. "The water will heal your heart. Alaytar Lalaith, Earendil the Mariner. Welcome to the Havens, the edge of the world."

At home, it would still be early March. Here, summer is all but here. I cast away my colorless cloak within a hundred meters. The forest is alive with animals, enormous flowers, and rippling streams.

The wood thins, and we walk out into the gorgeous soft sunlight and a green meadow dotted with wildflowers. A hill gently slopes downward with a valley path that we take. White-blossomed trees send sprays of flowers with every sea-scented breeze that rustles the branches.

It's paradise.

The stream that runs down the hill beside us evolves into a river, and then a lake of crystal in the bottom of the valley. The grass is silky and thick, giving it an otherworldly feel.

We appear to be heading towards a settlement in the valley that lays before us. The youngest of the elves grins and points. "Did you intend to arrive now? You chose well. Tonight, we feast."

I turn to Alaytar and grin. He graces me with a smile.

We reach the bottom of the valley and I see a cluster of villas. Our arrival is duly noted, as numerous elves, all seeming ageless, pop their heads out of their doors and windows to spot us.

Suddenly, I am assaulted by a violent memory. 

It's early evening. He's sitting on the seashore; she's curled up against him, half-lying, hald-sitting. They're content to stay, but something is pulling on him, dragging his consciousness far away from this, from her.

He returns at last to her. "Could you ever leave?"

"This? You?"

He searches the seas, as if he could see the very path to Paradise.

"For the Havens."

She closes her eyes. "I don't know."

"For Paradise, Elwing?"

She's young, that's what's holding her back, he realizes. She isn't ready to give up yet, to succumb to the call. In her heart, she's still in love with this earth.

"No." she says at last. "I couldn't."

He holds her gently. "Why?"

She searches his face with her green eyes. "I wouldn't want to forget."

I return to now, suddenly, as a gorgeous she elf dashes out of one of the villas, crying out a name that seems vaguely familiar. She's pretty in a pointed, sharp way, with long ropes of raven black hair. She makes straight for the youngest-looking of our company.

They collide, and he only just manages to stay upright, grasping her to him like he hasn't seen her in years. He murmurs into her ear, which makes her smile and throw her arms around his neck.

I realize I'm about to witness a kiss, so I look to comment to Alaytar, who, as proper as he is, will probably have something scathing to say.

I don't see him anywhere.

I look back to the elven couple who are indeed kissing in full view of everyone, and then I realize just how strong the elven magic that Elwing talked about - is.

The she-elf must be Kassandra, because it's Alaytar kissing her.

If I stay much longer, I won't remember my own name.